Made by Hallmark & originally broadcast on the Sci-Fi channel as a 3 part serial adaptation of Frank Herberts Dune I was mainly watching this to see if it was any better than the David Lynch movie. It probably cost a lot more (actually it was half the price of its 1984 movie counterpart at only $20 million) as is evident by sets, costumes and some of the special effects.
Its pretty annoying right away with Alec Newmans Paul Atreides unable to pronounce Thufir (calling him Toofer) and Ian McNieces Baron Harkonnen unable to even correctly pronounce his own families surname, neither can he pronounce Leto (Layto he says when it should be Leeto though). The chap playing Gurney Halleck wasn't a patch on Patrick Stewart and likewise the chap playing Thufir Hawat never came close to Freddie Jones' movie portrayal. With William Hurt playing Duke Leto you have to wonder if he knew what he was letting himself in for trying to follow in Jurgen Prochnow's footsteps.
At least in this version more is made of the role of Duncan Idaho (both he and Leto have gone to Arrakis 1st to establish themselves and Duncan is sent to try and contact the Fremen, it also differs from the movie as Paul and his mother Jessica travel to Arrakis without Leto). The Lady Jessica at least shows some type of personality in this as she shows she wishes to be equal with the natives of Arrakis speaking to them in their own language, the Shadout Mapes (Arakeen housekeeper) also has a strange accent and her pronouncement of Harkonnen sounds a lot like the Douglas Adams Hitchhikers characters the Haggunenon. The serving girls pronouncement of Muadib is also likewise brutally mangled.
After the arrival on Arrakis it appears there are mercenaries communicating with someone inside the palace (I wondered if this was supposed to mirror the Harkonnen suicide troops in the movie), the fact we see Dr Yueh (he'll never be as good as Dean Stockwell from the movie) sat next to a window in the very next scene is a good "tell" as anyone familiar with the movie knows he does in fact turn out to be a spy. It is even ironic that one of the lines spoken by Jessica to Yueh is "we have spies everywhere", unaware she in fact is talking to a spy herself.
We see a difference in stillsuit design (rather than being black like the ones in the movie in this version Pauls is coloured with desert camoflage however Leto's appeared to be green camoflage for some unexplainable reason), their "Ornithopter" is pretty similar to the shuttles used in the movie but appears to be a smaller vesel. The Spice Harvester actually reminded me of a cross between a Jawa Sandcrawler and an Eagle from Space 1999. It also appears the design of the worms has improved (more like the reimagined Sarlacc Pit from Return Of The Jedi).
In this version of Dune the colour scheme for the Harkonnens has been changed from Blondes wearing black to Redheads wearing red, its a very red colour palette indeed which is quite hard on the eyes in certain scenes in fact. The scenes in the Harkonnen court do heavily indicate how much money was lavished on sets leaving nothing for actors anyone has heard of. Another character who struggles and incorrectly pronounces Muadib is Liet-Kynes the Imperial Ecologist (originally played by Max Von Sydow in the movie, the actor playing him here is a complete unknown as is the case in most of the roles in this mini series. It is sad to think that only William Hurt and Ian McNeice represent the known cast for me).
As for the various parts of the mini series part 1 lasts 1 hour and 38 minutes, part 2 lasts 1 hour 35 minutes (and is subtitled Maudib so they couldn't even spell it right) and part 3 (subtitled The Prophet) lasts for 1 hour 36 minutes rounding out at an epically long 4 hours 49 minutes which is even longer than the longest cut of the movie. I guess for me this was more a spot the difference game as I didn't find much I liked about this new version. If you are a scifi fan and haven't seen the movie then this will probably be quite enjoyable if a little long.
For me every mistake or mispronounced name was painful, likewise the unknowns of the cast struggling to try and follow in the shoes of their movie counterparts. This version does have the advantage of more time to develop characters like Princess Irulan who hardly appears in the film. Gurney is a fuller personality too, not just shown as a soldier we also get to see him in his troubador aspect with a very lute looking Baliset. The character of Stilgar is introduced much earlier in this story and the character of Duncan (with his awesome Scottish lilt) is much better used, especially writing him into the scenes with the Fremen. It is Duncan & Liet-Kynes who save Paul & Jessica from the desert (instead of Yueh giving them stillsuits and Paul using "the voice"), sadly for a Fremen even Liet-Kynes can't bloody pronounce Muadib either (effectly the story pretty much jumped the shark right there when a Fremen leader can't even correctly say the name of a legendary Messiah).
Into watching part 2 I did find certain sets looked rather cheap like the desert outcropping where Paul tells Jessica he knows about his unborn sister, that particular set had a very cheaply looking painted backdrop. I'd seen more convincing matte work on 70's Doctor Who. A lot of the "sand dunes in the background" are actually so badly painted you can see the seams where the sheets of artwork are connected totally ruining the illusion of endless desert. Another special effect it seemed they no longer had money for by part 2 was the glowing blue eyes of the Fremen completely ruining any notion of continuity, they are there then gone but then just as suddenly back again. More names were being mangled in part 2, Chani being called Cheney by pretty much everybody was most notably annoying.
At least this version gives a good reason for Paul to be named Muadib as he does actually see the mouse he chooses to be named after (so they totally decided to drop the idea of Muadib being his secret name and not even bother calling him Usul), likewise the Desert Fremen are portrayed differently here showing themselves to adept as killers without the initial need for Paul or Jessica's Weirding training. This is used eventually when the Fremen decide to wage war to liberate Arrakis though. This does explore the politics & plans behind the the various occupations of Arrakis more thoroughly through Irulan and Feyd.
More is made of Gurneys role showing him as a smuggler, in this Paul & Chani have a son (this is mentioned in the book but overlooked in the movie) who is killed in an attack by the Emperors Sardaukar troops, Pauls sister Alia is captured (unlike the film where she is sent by Paul) and the end completely ruins everything that had gone before by asking you to accept that people fighting with knives will beat men with guns who vastly outnumber them. More is also made of the family relationship between Atreides & Harkonnen as shown by Paul calling Feyd cousin just before he kills him. Irulan agrees to marry Paul in the name of peace with Chani remaining as his concubine.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Movie Review - Breaking Glass
1980, Punk was dying and 2 Tone was only just getting established in the Midlands. Music was either the New Wave alternative, Glam Rock , Prog Rock or Disco. And what was Coventry songstress Hazel O'Connor doing with herself. Making this movie, Breaking Glass. It's about a young woman called Kate (apparently named after Kate Bush) trying to break into music from the bottom in the London music scene.
Along with a fairly young Phil Daniels fresh from Quadrophenia who plays her manager Danny are Jonathan Pryce playing their deaf saxaphone player Ken, Ken Campbell playing the pub landlord who hosts the bands early gigs (and consistantly refuses to pay them for any), Mark Wing Davey (better known as Zaphod Beeblebrox) playing the record exec that Phil is helping to artifically create sales for. As far as other musical talent there is Gary Tibbs (If his name isn't familar then you probably aren't a fan of Adam & The Ants) as the bands bass player.
We later learn Breaking Glass is the name of the group (probably stolen from the title of the 1977 Nick Lowe song I Love The Sound Of Breaking Glass). The movie is full of the culture at the time, Skinheads fighting, Train Strikes, power cuts, the brief surge in Nazi ideals from certain Skinhead groups, Police abusing their powers and record companies giving out rubbish contracts.The scene where they meet the German Nuns on Christmas Eve (or is it Christmas Day) is quite surreal and hard not to laugh at. Equally interesting is the performance of "Who Needs It" during a power cut in their gig. The movie does parallel Hazel O'Connors life a fair bit with the rapid rise to fame and the equally rapid descent into drugs and other problems.
Under a new producer their music is taken into a new direction going further out of Dannys control leading to Ken walking out of a recording session & the record execs spreading the seeds of discontent amongst the band but also playing off against Danny as well leading to him eventually quitting. There are also walkouts by the drummer & Ken.For those who think the makers of this film stole Kates glowing costume idea (which she wear while singing 8th Day) from Tron then think again because this was made a full year before Tron was even released.
Its hard to know if the scene in the tube after she runs out of the gig is some drug induced fantasy but I assume it is due to all the stuff the record company had been injecting her with before the gigs. After that your left seeing what living the hard life has done to her and the very open ending.A couple of interesting things to look out for are Gary Olsen calling himself Kates groupie at the 1st gig where she meets Danny (He's wearing a Specials T-shirt, another Coventry group) and the motorway sign pointing to Coventry after they sign their gig contract.
Movie Review - City Of Ember
Take the best ideas from Dark City, The Island, Logans Run & The Goonies and you think it'd make for a truely awesome movie. With the acting talents of Tim Robbins, Bill Murray & Martin Landau you do have 3 performances worth watching (especially Landau).
Set in some dystopian future after an unknown apocalyptic event the people who make decisions decide to create an underground city and leave it isolated for 200 years leaving them a box that would open after the 200 years expired with instructions for what to do next.
The box is passed down by the cities Mayors until 1 dies and the box is then forgotten from memory and lost in a cupboard. An unknown amount of years pass but the city called Ember by its inhabitants is decaying. It is running out of food and its power generators are gradually failing.
Enter our protagonists, 3 children. 2 of whom are allocated jobs that introduce them and us to various parts of Ember, we also get to see exactly how bad things are going. With power failing they are determined to find a way out of Ember, here is where the movie parallels Goonies but nowhere near as well.
Our kids find their way out far too easily and much too late into the movie, theres no feeling of peril during that task and their journey is over and done not long after getting started. The film itself is based on a book, I feel they used the city of Ember well but stayed there far too long. Not enough was made of their journey, I felt they escaped and there was never any doubt they would and they never felt in danger whilst doing it.
The movie does look wonderful, sets and costumes are great. Bill Murray as the overfed & self serving Mayor of Ember is good but underused. Tim Robbins as the inventor father is woefully underused, Martin Landau as the oldest worker in the power station is excellent but just as he is starting to make the most of his role it is already over. The fact that the 3 main performers are children is more than likely its sales angle (I felt they were aiming for the same audience who enjoyed Lemony Snicket as the 3 main kids were pretty much carbon copies of those roles).
The movie did feel short and I got the idea it has been very heavily cut to get a more family orientated certificate, its just that once out of Ember the escape to the surface is over and done and we never get to see if anyone else makes it out. The ending is just too open for my liking, it had a great start and middle but a very weak and under done ending.
Set in some dystopian future after an unknown apocalyptic event the people who make decisions decide to create an underground city and leave it isolated for 200 years leaving them a box that would open after the 200 years expired with instructions for what to do next.
The box is passed down by the cities Mayors until 1 dies and the box is then forgotten from memory and lost in a cupboard. An unknown amount of years pass but the city called Ember by its inhabitants is decaying. It is running out of food and its power generators are gradually failing.
Enter our protagonists, 3 children. 2 of whom are allocated jobs that introduce them and us to various parts of Ember, we also get to see exactly how bad things are going. With power failing they are determined to find a way out of Ember, here is where the movie parallels Goonies but nowhere near as well.
Our kids find their way out far too easily and much too late into the movie, theres no feeling of peril during that task and their journey is over and done not long after getting started. The film itself is based on a book, I feel they used the city of Ember well but stayed there far too long. Not enough was made of their journey, I felt they escaped and there was never any doubt they would and they never felt in danger whilst doing it.
The movie does look wonderful, sets and costumes are great. Bill Murray as the overfed & self serving Mayor of Ember is good but underused. Tim Robbins as the inventor father is woefully underused, Martin Landau as the oldest worker in the power station is excellent but just as he is starting to make the most of his role it is already over. The fact that the 3 main performers are children is more than likely its sales angle (I felt they were aiming for the same audience who enjoyed Lemony Snicket as the 3 main kids were pretty much carbon copies of those roles).
The movie did feel short and I got the idea it has been very heavily cut to get a more family orientated certificate, its just that once out of Ember the escape to the surface is over and done and we never get to see if anyone else makes it out. The ending is just too open for my liking, it had a great start and middle but a very weak and under done ending.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Movie Review - Stockade aka Cadence
I saw the cast list mentioning both Martin & Charlie Sheen which interested me, the story being set in a military prison also interested me. Having Lawrence Fishburne (pretty early in his career as he was still going by Larry Fishburne which made me wonder if Martin Sheen had remembered working with him in Apocalypse Now) in the cast also influenced me and knowing Martin Sheen directed got me even more curious. Watching the opening credits I thought the name Ramon Estevez felt very familiar and it turns out he is in fact Charlie Sheens older brother and Martin Sheens 2nd oldest son.
Set in 1965 the story starts with Franklin Bean (Charlie Sheen) on leave in Montana to attend the funeral of his father before returning to Wittsberg in Germany. In a drunken emotional binge afterwards he gets himself 2 visible tattoos on his hands before jumping through the window of a bar. In hospital (because he got glass in his skull) he is told he could do 90 days in the stockade or go to court martial and face a possible 3 year stretch. Actually his lawyer is pretty bad as he committed the offence off duty in a civilian bar so realistically the German police would have handled it. His lawyer claims he hit an MP (it was a light shove if anything) and Frank is coerced into accepting the 90 days in the stockade even though he asked for a discharge.
Beans Army lawyer clearly isn't very good, I'd have had him free in days with no jail time at all, you have to take his bereavement into account. We then see him entering the stockade where he meets Master Sgt Otis McKinney (played by his father and director of this film, Martin Sheen) then his fellow prisoners who are all black. Even though segregation was over by this time there were still racial rifts in America and the service so this film is playing heavily on that theme here.
We meet more of the Stockade staff including Cpl Gessner (Ramon Estevez, Charlies older brother who looked like a dead ringer for Charlie when he played Wild Thing in Major League) and Cpl Lamar and follow the prisoners on their work detail and their lives within the barracks. Punishments (or Gigs) are handed out for even the most seemingly inoffensive offenses and we also see the gradual bond formed between Bean and his fellow prisoners after a fight that he doesn't rat them out for.
You have to question why McKinney himself isn't arrested by the MP's for his drunken outburst after failing to speak to his son on his own birthday, far too much leeway was shown by lamar & Gessner. I did quite enjoy seeing the other guys trying to teach Bean how to do their cadence dance, especially the sequence where they are practicing it on the work detail farm as the soundtrack plays a match by Souza. McKinney tries to make friends with Bean who calls him a bully and says he hates everything he stands for, hearing this makes McKinney shut down Beans project to repair a windmill on the work farm. They disregard his orders and repair it anyway.
Taking them to the work farm during the night McKinney offers them the chance to escape knowing he can shoot them if they try, its clear that when McKinney talks to Bean he has had some kind of breakdown as he calls him by his sons name and is clearly trying to battle some inner demons about that relationship. This is pretty much confirmed when he starts shooting at one of the prisoners (Sweetbread, a quiet but slightly simple minded man) who had wandered off without McKinney issuing any kind of warning or challenge as an armed person is required to before opening fire. By the time the 7th shot is fired it is clear Sweetbread was coming back (even though he actually wasn't trying to escape) and is killed by the 8th shot (McKinney couldn't have fired again, there were only 8 rounds in the clip),
Beans sentance is commuted so he can rejoin his unit shipping out to Vietnam whilst a trial is held against McKinney with the clear intent it is for show only and the prisoners are pretty much ignored as the proscution lawyer (the same guy who forced Bean to accept 90 days in the stockade) chooses to whitewash the evidence to get McKinney off the charge ofm murder. Theres the rather cleverly hidden Sheen family reference as the MP who lets Bean in to see McKinney in the Psych Adin ward is called Estevez (Charlie & Martin Sheens real surname) whats also quite fun is the guy playing the MP is former Jafar Teal'c better known as Christopher Judge from Stargate SG1. Its probably unintentionally ironic that the flag is being lowered as Bean leaves from visiting McKinney just to underline the fact that McKinneys reign as a figure of authority is well and truly over.
I was a bit unsure why Lamar & Gessner salute Bean (he is only a Private and they were both Corporals) but I see it as them acknowledging his return to Army life. Its a very open end to the movie, possibly a little too open as it would have been nice to have seen either Lamar or Gessner promoted and in charge and a more definate idea on the condition of McKinney. If you like Military movies or prison movies I'd recommend this, its also very good for the performances of the whole Sheen clan and the other prisoners.
Set in 1965 the story starts with Franklin Bean (Charlie Sheen) on leave in Montana to attend the funeral of his father before returning to Wittsberg in Germany. In a drunken emotional binge afterwards he gets himself 2 visible tattoos on his hands before jumping through the window of a bar. In hospital (because he got glass in his skull) he is told he could do 90 days in the stockade or go to court martial and face a possible 3 year stretch. Actually his lawyer is pretty bad as he committed the offence off duty in a civilian bar so realistically the German police would have handled it. His lawyer claims he hit an MP (it was a light shove if anything) and Frank is coerced into accepting the 90 days in the stockade even though he asked for a discharge.
Beans Army lawyer clearly isn't very good, I'd have had him free in days with no jail time at all, you have to take his bereavement into account. We then see him entering the stockade where he meets Master Sgt Otis McKinney (played by his father and director of this film, Martin Sheen) then his fellow prisoners who are all black. Even though segregation was over by this time there were still racial rifts in America and the service so this film is playing heavily on that theme here.
We meet more of the Stockade staff including Cpl Gessner (Ramon Estevez, Charlies older brother who looked like a dead ringer for Charlie when he played Wild Thing in Major League) and Cpl Lamar and follow the prisoners on their work detail and their lives within the barracks. Punishments (or Gigs) are handed out for even the most seemingly inoffensive offenses and we also see the gradual bond formed between Bean and his fellow prisoners after a fight that he doesn't rat them out for.
You have to question why McKinney himself isn't arrested by the MP's for his drunken outburst after failing to speak to his son on his own birthday, far too much leeway was shown by lamar & Gessner. I did quite enjoy seeing the other guys trying to teach Bean how to do their cadence dance, especially the sequence where they are practicing it on the work detail farm as the soundtrack plays a match by Souza. McKinney tries to make friends with Bean who calls him a bully and says he hates everything he stands for, hearing this makes McKinney shut down Beans project to repair a windmill on the work farm. They disregard his orders and repair it anyway.
Taking them to the work farm during the night McKinney offers them the chance to escape knowing he can shoot them if they try, its clear that when McKinney talks to Bean he has had some kind of breakdown as he calls him by his sons name and is clearly trying to battle some inner demons about that relationship. This is pretty much confirmed when he starts shooting at one of the prisoners (Sweetbread, a quiet but slightly simple minded man) who had wandered off without McKinney issuing any kind of warning or challenge as an armed person is required to before opening fire. By the time the 7th shot is fired it is clear Sweetbread was coming back (even though he actually wasn't trying to escape) and is killed by the 8th shot (McKinney couldn't have fired again, there were only 8 rounds in the clip),
Beans sentance is commuted so he can rejoin his unit shipping out to Vietnam whilst a trial is held against McKinney with the clear intent it is for show only and the prisoners are pretty much ignored as the proscution lawyer (the same guy who forced Bean to accept 90 days in the stockade) chooses to whitewash the evidence to get McKinney off the charge ofm murder. Theres the rather cleverly hidden Sheen family reference as the MP who lets Bean in to see McKinney in the Psych Adin ward is called Estevez (Charlie & Martin Sheens real surname) whats also quite fun is the guy playing the MP is former Jafar Teal'c better known as Christopher Judge from Stargate SG1. Its probably unintentionally ironic that the flag is being lowered as Bean leaves from visiting McKinney just to underline the fact that McKinneys reign as a figure of authority is well and truly over.
I was a bit unsure why Lamar & Gessner salute Bean (he is only a Private and they were both Corporals) but I see it as them acknowledging his return to Army life. Its a very open end to the movie, possibly a little too open as it would have been nice to have seen either Lamar or Gessner promoted and in charge and a more definate idea on the condition of McKinney. If you like Military movies or prison movies I'd recommend this, its also very good for the performances of the whole Sheen clan and the other prisoners.
Movie Review - Madagascar 2 - Escape To Africa
With the speed this went from release to dvd you have to wonder if its going to be any good, at least with their previous release Dreamworks did actually bother with a cinema release. Generally anything that goes straight to video/dvd is something to be suspicious about.
The movie has an odd start but you'll eventually release you are watching the back story behind Alex the lion (voiced by Ben Stiller). Sadly its also in those opening few minutes that the whole movie jumps the shark (any sane adult is going to question how a baby lion cub could possibly survive drifting in a crate on the ocean from Africa to America without starving to death), but we're back on the island and jumping a whole new and completely different shark there instead with the idea that penguins can fly a DC10.
Using the crashed plane (If you remember it from the original movie) the animals decide to return to New York but run out of fuel and crash land and encounter people or more accurately tourists (so we have to assume they are in some sort of game reserve on the African mainland so they've flown at least a minimum of 263 miles from Madagascar, my guess from Google Earth would be they landed in Kruger National Park).
We have yet more shark jumping with Alex and an old lady fighting (like a fully grown Lion wouldn't tear her to pieces in seconds) then Alex reuniting with his parents (and yet more shark jumping as his wild parents are clearly mixing with prey species yet getting along as though they were friends). Marty the Zebra finds himself a herd (all of whom are voiced by Chris Rock as though just listening to one of him wasn't bad enough), Melman (still being voiced by David Schwimmer) find himself some friends in the giraffe world and even Gloria finds other hippos and to her delight male hippos.
Sadly King Julien (the stupid monkey from the island voiced by Sacha Baron Cohen STILL doing his bloody awful Jim Broadbent impression, why not just hire Jim Broadbent - he's way cheaper) & Maurice also survived the crash.
As for the guy voicing male hippo Moto Moto (Rapper and former member of The Black Eyed Peas Will.i.am) he just sounds like he has a sore throat or has watched way too many blaxsploitation films. Yet more shark jumping comes with the penguins stealing and being able to drive a truck and the old lady who survives being hit by it. I know all these things are done for comical effect but their just stupid and not possible.
Have these people never seen Hi-di-hi? Ted's 1st rule of comedy, realism. Rather unsurprisingly for a film with so little realism it DOES actually feature a scene of not only a jumping shark but the same shark also being jumped on. The penguins continually recycling the very tired 6 to 9/69 joke (which wasn't even funny the 1st time they said it) is pretty annoying however the Planet Of The Apes "but your so ugly) line is pretty funny if you get the reference.
Alex manages to screw up his coming of age ceremony and gets both himself and his parents banished which leaves his fathers rival Makunga (Alec Baldwin doing his very best Kelsey Grammer impression) in charge (how very Lion King), the zebras line about being "exactly the same" couldn't be more wrong as every zebras stripes are uniquely different. It seems no-one spotted that the penguins rebuilding the plane is actually a parody or reference to The Flight of the Phoenix.
We cover the storyline of Melmans love for Gloria (when Schwimmer speaks about how Melman would treat his ideal woman he just sounds like the same whiny old Ross Gellar from Friends insisting he was "on a break") and the animals discover their waterhole has dried up, Alex goes off to find out why (after fixing his relationship issues with Marty) and the other animals start to have doubts about Makunga being their Alpha Male.
King Julien suggests a sacrifice to the local volcano to appease the rain gods (Most definately stolen from the Tom Hanks film Joe Versus The Volcano) so they may possibly be in Arusha National Park in Tanzania as that has a volcano.
Melman volunteers and finally tells Gloria his true feelings. Alex & Marty discover the watering hole has gone dry due to a dam being built by the stranded tourists led by the old woman and Alex is captured, Gloria saves Melman from the volcano and Alex's father saves him from being dinner but Alex saves him from being shot by dancing for the New Yorkers who recognise him.
The dam is destroyed (the whole Chinese whispers scene is a good idea but isn't executed very well as there are much funnier things they could have appeared to have been saying( and the animals welcome back Alex & his father Zuba as heroes, what is really annoying is that a jumping shark is implied to have actually made the water come back.
What is even more annoying is the old woman who can beat up a fully grown wild African Lion. Theres a feel good ending which gets rid of the penguins (thank god) but the main characters are still left in Africa with the ending open enough to make a sequal which apparently is going to happen.
The movie has an odd start but you'll eventually release you are watching the back story behind Alex the lion (voiced by Ben Stiller). Sadly its also in those opening few minutes that the whole movie jumps the shark (any sane adult is going to question how a baby lion cub could possibly survive drifting in a crate on the ocean from Africa to America without starving to death), but we're back on the island and jumping a whole new and completely different shark there instead with the idea that penguins can fly a DC10.
Using the crashed plane (If you remember it from the original movie) the animals decide to return to New York but run out of fuel and crash land and encounter people or more accurately tourists (so we have to assume they are in some sort of game reserve on the African mainland so they've flown at least a minimum of 263 miles from Madagascar, my guess from Google Earth would be they landed in Kruger National Park).
We have yet more shark jumping with Alex and an old lady fighting (like a fully grown Lion wouldn't tear her to pieces in seconds) then Alex reuniting with his parents (and yet more shark jumping as his wild parents are clearly mixing with prey species yet getting along as though they were friends). Marty the Zebra finds himself a herd (all of whom are voiced by Chris Rock as though just listening to one of him wasn't bad enough), Melman (still being voiced by David Schwimmer) find himself some friends in the giraffe world and even Gloria finds other hippos and to her delight male hippos.
Sadly King Julien (the stupid monkey from the island voiced by Sacha Baron Cohen STILL doing his bloody awful Jim Broadbent impression, why not just hire Jim Broadbent - he's way cheaper) & Maurice also survived the crash.
As for the guy voicing male hippo Moto Moto (Rapper and former member of The Black Eyed Peas Will.i.am) he just sounds like he has a sore throat or has watched way too many blaxsploitation films. Yet more shark jumping comes with the penguins stealing and being able to drive a truck and the old lady who survives being hit by it. I know all these things are done for comical effect but their just stupid and not possible.
Have these people never seen Hi-di-hi? Ted's 1st rule of comedy, realism. Rather unsurprisingly for a film with so little realism it DOES actually feature a scene of not only a jumping shark but the same shark also being jumped on. The penguins continually recycling the very tired 6 to 9/69 joke (which wasn't even funny the 1st time they said it) is pretty annoying however the Planet Of The Apes "but your so ugly) line is pretty funny if you get the reference.
Alex manages to screw up his coming of age ceremony and gets both himself and his parents banished which leaves his fathers rival Makunga (Alec Baldwin doing his very best Kelsey Grammer impression) in charge (how very Lion King), the zebras line about being "exactly the same" couldn't be more wrong as every zebras stripes are uniquely different. It seems no-one spotted that the penguins rebuilding the plane is actually a parody or reference to The Flight of the Phoenix.
We cover the storyline of Melmans love for Gloria (when Schwimmer speaks about how Melman would treat his ideal woman he just sounds like the same whiny old Ross Gellar from Friends insisting he was "on a break") and the animals discover their waterhole has dried up, Alex goes off to find out why (after fixing his relationship issues with Marty) and the other animals start to have doubts about Makunga being their Alpha Male.
King Julien suggests a sacrifice to the local volcano to appease the rain gods (Most definately stolen from the Tom Hanks film Joe Versus The Volcano) so they may possibly be in Arusha National Park in Tanzania as that has a volcano.
Melman volunteers and finally tells Gloria his true feelings. Alex & Marty discover the watering hole has gone dry due to a dam being built by the stranded tourists led by the old woman and Alex is captured, Gloria saves Melman from the volcano and Alex's father saves him from being dinner but Alex saves him from being shot by dancing for the New Yorkers who recognise him.
The dam is destroyed (the whole Chinese whispers scene is a good idea but isn't executed very well as there are much funnier things they could have appeared to have been saying( and the animals welcome back Alex & his father Zuba as heroes, what is really annoying is that a jumping shark is implied to have actually made the water come back.
What is even more annoying is the old woman who can beat up a fully grown wild African Lion. Theres a feel good ending which gets rid of the penguins (thank god) but the main characters are still left in Africa with the ending open enough to make a sequal which apparently is going to happen.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Movie Review - Howls Moving Castle
I've wanted to see this ever since I saw clips of it on Jonathon Ross's "Japanorama" show on BBC3 several years ago. I guess you'd class it as Anime but it was clearly made with a Western audience in mind as most signs and numbers are written in English (Although I did see a poster written in German & some boxes labelled in what looked like French).
You don't need the subtitles switched on as there is English dialogue but the subtitles were clearly translated from Japanese as they do differ from the spoken English dialogue in grammar and structure, not all translations are exact either.
The look of the movie is very much like something from the mind of animator Terry Gilliam, especially the castle on legs striding across the rural countryside. Its very much like something he'd have thought of. It's difficult to know what time period the movie is supposed to be set in seeing Cavalrymen on Horses but steam powered Trams, Trains, Steam Cars & Sedan Chairs too.
It appears the lead character of the film is Sophie who works in a millinery shop (thats hats to you philistines) and we start off meeting her leaving work, being rescued from the over amourous attention of 2 soldiers by a chap who not only seems to know Jedi Mind tricks but can also fly and is being chased by evil black ectoplasmic creatures.
Sophie discusses her encounter with her sister Lettie and they also discuss Howl (he's clearly a Wizard and everyone thinks he's evil and eats womens hearts), returning to the Shop Sophie has a spell cast on her by The Witch Of The Wastes which turns her into an old women. She avoids her mother and leaves town rescuing a scarecrow which repays her with a walking cane and helps her to find shelter, inside Howls Moving Castle. A bit like the Tardis, even though its moving the inside of the castle always remains stationary as though it were a normal static dwelling.
This is obviously a world where magic is totally normal (as Sophie wasn't surprised by a magical scarecrow) as meeting a Fire Demon called Calciifer didn't even seem to phase her, it seems Howls Castle is even more like the Stargate as it is able to be static yet its front door and exterior can be in many different locations at once (Actually it seems to be based on the Terry Pratchett idea of Wandering Shops).
All of the callers seem to think different Wizards live there but none think it is Howl. We discover the man who saved Sophie is of course Howl (who can't be that great a wizard if he doesn't recognise someone under an spell) and to remain close to him she pretends she is his new cleaning lady.
We also discover (thanks to Howl) that Sophie appears as a normal girl when she sleeps. One thing can be said for certain, this is a world where several cities or countries are involved in a war (with flying battleships and iron ships that look like US Civil War steamers) but even the Witch Of The Waste seems to have a Tardis-like Sedan chair, definately bigger on the inside.
It's rather strange that whilst talking to the Kings Head Sorceror Sulliman (a mistranslation surely as she is clearly female) that Sophie briefly transforms into her younger self whilst making an impassioned speech on Howls behalf. Sulliman had also taken all the magic from The Witch Of The Waste and tried to trap Howl who saves Sophie.
Sophie escapes back to the castle and wakes up but is still young, checking on Howl she tells him she loves him. When he rejects her she becomes old again but it is difficult to know if that was a dream or not. Afer using Calcifer to move the Castle it also completely reconfigures and repairs the interior (again like another aspect of the Tardis, able to add new rooms), Sophie also appears to get younger again when Howl takes her into his secret garden.
From what I could understand Sophie gets younger when she acknowledges her feelings of love for Howl. Sophie is visited by her mother (who was forced to leave a spying bug by Sulliman) but it is destroyed by The Witch Of The Wastes using Calcifer to burn it but it leaves him weakened and unable to protect the house from invasion and bombing.
So many of the images of flying ships and burning birds remind of Battle Of The Planets (Gatchaman) it made me wonder if the maker of this had seen the cartoon as a child. Trying to help Howl Sophie removes Calcifer from the castle which destroys it but he is able to reconfigure it only smaller when she returns him and gives him her hair.
The Witch Of The Wastes manages to ruin everything removing calfifer from his hearth forcing Sophie to throw water over her to stop her catching fire which destroys most of what is left of the castle. Sent back into Howls childhood Sophie discovers it is Calcifer who takes Howls heart and keeps him enchanted as a shape shifter, taking Howl back to what is left of the castle Sophie gives Howl his heart back which frees calcifer but destroys the castle.
The magical scarecrow saves them from certain death and she kisses him which releases him from a spell, he turns out to be a missing Prince who can stop the war. Sulliman also stops the war using her royal contacts and calcifer repairs the castle and Sophie and Howl fly off into the sky.
It's an odd ending to an odd but sweet film which is apparently very loosely based on a novel by Diana Wynne Jones, the film is just under 2 hours long but I think it could be cut by about 20 minutes as it is just too long in places.
You don't need the subtitles switched on as there is English dialogue but the subtitles were clearly translated from Japanese as they do differ from the spoken English dialogue in grammar and structure, not all translations are exact either.
The look of the movie is very much like something from the mind of animator Terry Gilliam, especially the castle on legs striding across the rural countryside. Its very much like something he'd have thought of. It's difficult to know what time period the movie is supposed to be set in seeing Cavalrymen on Horses but steam powered Trams, Trains, Steam Cars & Sedan Chairs too.
It appears the lead character of the film is Sophie who works in a millinery shop (thats hats to you philistines) and we start off meeting her leaving work, being rescued from the over amourous attention of 2 soldiers by a chap who not only seems to know Jedi Mind tricks but can also fly and is being chased by evil black ectoplasmic creatures.
Sophie discusses her encounter with her sister Lettie and they also discuss Howl (he's clearly a Wizard and everyone thinks he's evil and eats womens hearts), returning to the Shop Sophie has a spell cast on her by The Witch Of The Wastes which turns her into an old women. She avoids her mother and leaves town rescuing a scarecrow which repays her with a walking cane and helps her to find shelter, inside Howls Moving Castle. A bit like the Tardis, even though its moving the inside of the castle always remains stationary as though it were a normal static dwelling.
This is obviously a world where magic is totally normal (as Sophie wasn't surprised by a magical scarecrow) as meeting a Fire Demon called Calciifer didn't even seem to phase her, it seems Howls Castle is even more like the Stargate as it is able to be static yet its front door and exterior can be in many different locations at once (Actually it seems to be based on the Terry Pratchett idea of Wandering Shops).
All of the callers seem to think different Wizards live there but none think it is Howl. We discover the man who saved Sophie is of course Howl (who can't be that great a wizard if he doesn't recognise someone under an spell) and to remain close to him she pretends she is his new cleaning lady.
We also discover (thanks to Howl) that Sophie appears as a normal girl when she sleeps. One thing can be said for certain, this is a world where several cities or countries are involved in a war (with flying battleships and iron ships that look like US Civil War steamers) but even the Witch Of The Waste seems to have a Tardis-like Sedan chair, definately bigger on the inside.
It's rather strange that whilst talking to the Kings Head Sorceror Sulliman (a mistranslation surely as she is clearly female) that Sophie briefly transforms into her younger self whilst making an impassioned speech on Howls behalf. Sulliman had also taken all the magic from The Witch Of The Waste and tried to trap Howl who saves Sophie.
Sophie escapes back to the castle and wakes up but is still young, checking on Howl she tells him she loves him. When he rejects her she becomes old again but it is difficult to know if that was a dream or not. Afer using Calcifer to move the Castle it also completely reconfigures and repairs the interior (again like another aspect of the Tardis, able to add new rooms), Sophie also appears to get younger again when Howl takes her into his secret garden.
From what I could understand Sophie gets younger when she acknowledges her feelings of love for Howl. Sophie is visited by her mother (who was forced to leave a spying bug by Sulliman) but it is destroyed by The Witch Of The Wastes using Calcifer to burn it but it leaves him weakened and unable to protect the house from invasion and bombing.
So many of the images of flying ships and burning birds remind of Battle Of The Planets (Gatchaman) it made me wonder if the maker of this had seen the cartoon as a child. Trying to help Howl Sophie removes Calcifer from the castle which destroys it but he is able to reconfigure it only smaller when she returns him and gives him her hair.
The Witch Of The Wastes manages to ruin everything removing calfifer from his hearth forcing Sophie to throw water over her to stop her catching fire which destroys most of what is left of the castle. Sent back into Howls childhood Sophie discovers it is Calcifer who takes Howls heart and keeps him enchanted as a shape shifter, taking Howl back to what is left of the castle Sophie gives Howl his heart back which frees calcifer but destroys the castle.
The magical scarecrow saves them from certain death and she kisses him which releases him from a spell, he turns out to be a missing Prince who can stop the war. Sulliman also stops the war using her royal contacts and calcifer repairs the castle and Sophie and Howl fly off into the sky.
It's an odd ending to an odd but sweet film which is apparently very loosely based on a novel by Diana Wynne Jones, the film is just under 2 hours long but I think it could be cut by about 20 minutes as it is just too long in places.
My Weekly TNA Catch-up, Impact 1st Jan 09
Just like last week I wasn't sure if there was going to be an Impact this week seeing as Thursday fell on New Years Day but I guess they managed to squeeze some filming in before breaking for Christmas. As of now the catch-up will only appear in alt.fan.tna and on my blog. If it appears ANYWHERE else then you stole it without my consent or permission.
Basically this week is a clip show with only 1 match you haven't seen before so this is going to be a VERY short catch-up as I'm stuffed if I'm going to review matches I already reviewed once this year. Results have been cut & pasted from my blogs.
Bound For Glory PPV Oct 12th 08 - Jeff Jarrett vs Kurt Angle with Mick Foley as special guest enforcer. Double DQ and no man wins or DQ on Jarrett for outside interefence by Foley. Screw what Tenay & West say.
Knockout Championship Impact Jan 10th 08 - Awesome Kong vs Gail Kim. Kong made 3 powerbombs and finally wins the title.
Lockdown PPV April 13th 08 - Samoa Joe vs Kurt Angle. Joe won off the musclebuster becoming new TNA Heavyweight Champion.
Turning Point PPV Nov 9th 08 - AJ Styles vs Sting. Sting retained the title.
Tag Teag Championship - LAX vs Beer Money. It's the only match you haven't seen before on this 1st Impact of the year. Homicide & James Storm kicked this one off. Not a great match and made even worse by the fact they took a break during it despite the fact its actually the only real match of the show. LAX had the much better match but they are the much better team in terms of talent and ability anyway. I'm not enjoying seeing Jaqueline taking a back seat and not even wearing ring clothes any more, does anyone know the story behind that? Is she injured or pregnant or what? After Roode kicked out from being hit by the title belt you knew Beer Money were going to retain their title which they did after Roode sent Homicide into a chair shot from Jaqueline to make the roll up for the pin.
This is a really weak way for TNA to start the new year, with a clipshow. It can only get better after that.
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