Well, I found this weeks Smackdown and i'm going to review it. be it bad or good it'll get as fair a review as i can give it. the views here are my own. i can't promise to be unbiased but if it's entertaining i'll say so. If it's not, I'll also say so. I won't apologise for not recognising any workers WWE may have hired in the last 4 yrs as I haven't been a regular viewer.
Here goes:- Show opens with Edge & Teddy Long and some bird in a wheelchair (was that Vickie Guerrero, Eddies wife? She got fat!) already in the ring. Edge bores us on the mic, obviously this is wwe's latest version of a piper's pit revamp? Flair comes down to join the yack-fest.
CM Punk, Festus & Jesse vs Chavo Guerrero, Miz & Morrison. Someone wants to tell Festus, George "The Animal" Steele called and he wants his gimmick back. Apart from introducing Chavo & Punk, didn't we see this match last week? And it was f**king S**T then. Query, if Punk & Chavo are ECW guys, what the f**k are they doing on Smackdown? Not a great match, Festus took the win. I'd rate this at a generous 2 thanks to some nice out of the ring jumps.
Batista vs MVP. Before he got to the ring Dave seemed to have taken so many steroids he couldn't work out how to get down the ramp to the ring. It's called a straight line, Dave. As the US title was held up I assume it was on the line? Isn't that an old WCW belt? Used to be called the US Television Title? MVP won off a count-out? C***py win, very weak match, Scored a 1.
Some backstage s**t probably to progress storylines.
Jamie Noble vs The Big Show - In which universe was this ever going to be entertaining? Calling the win for Show before it ever got going. Smacks of "we have no ideas" from Uncreative. This seemed to have no finish after Show waffled to the people. Rule it a no contest as the ref was pulling Noble out of the ring. Scores 0, gets creative called a bunch of c**ts.
The Undertaker vs Edge, Curt Hawkins & Zack Ryder in a 3 on 1 handicap match. A match that sounded pointless before the bell rang. This is either for Undertaker to steamroller all 3 guys and injure Edge or for them to steamroller Undertaker and for Edge to injure him prior to Wrestlemania. technically this ISN'T a 3-1 match as Edge and co were acting as a 3 man tagteam. There was LOTS of bad positioning by the ref in this one, he was constantly running to get out of the way.
Taker was the best worker in this match by far showing his usual good work rate selling and giving it out too. Edge got the win off the spear for his team when Taker was trying to double chokeslam Hawkins & Ryder. Scores a 1. Not as many matches as last week. Not any better either.
Friday, March 7, 2008
Friday, February 29, 2008
WWE Friday Night Smackdown. 29th Feb 08 reviewed
My Review of this weeks Smackdown. I haven't seen Smackdown in over 4 years so this'll be an interesting experience. I'm reviewing it completely open minded. Just like my TNA reviews, the usual caveats apply I'll call it how I see it. I may use colourful language or curse or swear. If it's s**t, I'll say so. I won't apologise for not knowing who certain people are that WWE may have hired in the last 4 years.
I'm in a truly unique position after my review of a recent RAW show, once I've seen this, as an impartial observer I'll be able to tell all you loyal WWE fans exactly what kind of condition the WWE is actually in at the moment and I'll be honest but brutal . So on with the review:-
Show opens with the Wrestlemania news conference. YAWN!
2 on 1 handicap match - The Big Show vs Joey Ryan & Jay Garland. Obviously these 2 guys were jobbers, Show taking the predictable win. Rating? 0
Jamie Noble vs Chuck Palumbo - An overly long match, pretty dull really. Palumbo took the predictable win. Rating? A generous 2.
MVP & Khali vs Batista & Kane - Batista & Kane haven't changed in 4+ yrs, I don't know either of the other 2 guysl. MVP looks like a cheap Booker T impression, Khali smells of Giant Gonzalez wannabe. Not a great match, Khali was very short on moves. Likewise MVP. Batista got the win. Rating? 2
The Miz & John Morrison vs Festus & Jesse - Nobody I know in this one. Festus got the win. Rating? An overly generous 1
Big Daddy V vs Balls Mahony - Daddy V I remember as both face & heel when he was part of MOM. Balls I haven't seen work outside of ECW to be honest. This was actually quite watchable until Undertakers music kicked in. Result? A No Contest. Rating? 3.
Taker then bores us on the mic.
Zack Ryder vs The Undertaker - Taker took the win, very boring match. Rating? An extremely generous 1.
Well this was certainly a short show, they managed to do video packages of just about every star they have.
Thoughts on the state of the WWE.
All the matches were utterly awful and had no entertainment value what so ever.
If this is the best Smackdown has to offer then it's truly died on it's a**e. Rating it against RAW? The Raw show was longer and had the exact same amount of matches that Smackdown fitted into 45 minutes, 4 matches and 1 aborted match with no finish.
If those 2 shows are typical of what WWE is currently offering as a product today then Vince needs to look into finding a new avenue to invest his money in because WWE appears to have quite literally stopped working. It hasn't progressed in 4 years. All the workers I recognised don't seemed to advanced as either characters or in actual amount of talent. None of the new guys impressed me in the slightest and thats really sad as WWE's future lies in developing its new talent.
I'm in a truly unique position after my review of a recent RAW show, once I've seen this, as an impartial observer I'll be able to tell all you loyal WWE fans exactly what kind of condition the WWE is actually in at the moment and I'll be honest but brutal . So on with the review:-
Show opens with the Wrestlemania news conference. YAWN!
2 on 1 handicap match - The Big Show vs Joey Ryan & Jay Garland. Obviously these 2 guys were jobbers, Show taking the predictable win. Rating? 0
Jamie Noble vs Chuck Palumbo - An overly long match, pretty dull really. Palumbo took the predictable win. Rating? A generous 2.
MVP & Khali vs Batista & Kane - Batista & Kane haven't changed in 4+ yrs, I don't know either of the other 2 guysl. MVP looks like a cheap Booker T impression, Khali smells of Giant Gonzalez wannabe. Not a great match, Khali was very short on moves. Likewise MVP. Batista got the win. Rating? 2
The Miz & John Morrison vs Festus & Jesse - Nobody I know in this one. Festus got the win. Rating? An overly generous 1
Big Daddy V vs Balls Mahony - Daddy V I remember as both face & heel when he was part of MOM. Balls I haven't seen work outside of ECW to be honest. This was actually quite watchable until Undertakers music kicked in. Result? A No Contest. Rating? 3.
Taker then bores us on the mic.
Zack Ryder vs The Undertaker - Taker took the win, very boring match. Rating? An extremely generous 1.
Well this was certainly a short show, they managed to do video packages of just about every star they have.
Thoughts on the state of the WWE.
All the matches were utterly awful and had no entertainment value what so ever.
If this is the best Smackdown has to offer then it's truly died on it's a**e. Rating it against RAW? The Raw show was longer and had the exact same amount of matches that Smackdown fitted into 45 minutes, 4 matches and 1 aborted match with no finish.
If those 2 shows are typical of what WWE is currently offering as a product today then Vince needs to look into finding a new avenue to invest his money in because WWE appears to have quite literally stopped working. It hasn't progressed in 4 years. All the workers I recognised don't seemed to advanced as either characters or in actual amount of talent. None of the new guys impressed me in the slightest and thats really sad as WWE's future lies in developing its new talent.
Monday, February 18, 2008
WWE RAW 18th Feb 08 reviewed
Wow! Well having found a new newsgroup service through my ISP I found this show in the tv group so I'm watching it today and reviewing it like I would any other show. The same caveats apply as to my TNA reviews, the views expressed within are my own. I won't apologise for not knowing certain wrestlers as this is my 1st viewing of ANY WWE programming in over 3 years, almost 4 in fact. I call it how I see it, I may use colourful language & have been known to curse and swear so onto the review.
RAW 18th Feb 08 - The Show opens with HHH coming down to bore us on the mic, he's interupted by Randy Orton (looking more like a gay pornstar than ever!), Orton is interupted from his rant by John Cena (still using that s***ty rapper gimmick after more than 3 years?) & Cena's rant is interupted by William Regal (that's some serious hair you got there, Regal!).
Money In The Bank Qualifier match, Jeff Hardy vs Snitsky - Well I've certainly seen both of these 2 before and on the face of it, it's a complete mismatch with Snitsky's size. Snitsky was on top for most of this match which was to be expected, Hardy got the eventual win and still looks a decent enough worker!
HBK (why is JR referring to him as a "young man" ? He's one of WWE's oldest these days!) comes down to announce Ric Flairs induction into the HOF.
Paul Burchill vs Super Crazy - Burchill I've never seen before, Crazy I've seen in WCW and WWE as part of the LWO when Eddie was still alive. The match itself was short and nothing to write home about with Super Crazy jobbing to Burchill big time. Crazy is much better than this match by a long chalk.
Big Show getting his nose bust, Mayweathers 3rd punch (the left) was the killer blow. I don't care what he was saying, its just s**t from "Creative".
Money In The Bank Qualifier match, Mr. Kennedy vs Val Venis. Wow, Val's still working for WWE? No idea who Kennedy is, never seen him before. He certainly likes his technical wrestling as most of his match was on the mat and he got the eventual win. It looks like WWE make their established talent job to the FNG's on a regular basis these days then?
Steel Cage Match - Mr McMahon vs Hornswoggle. Wow, they are stooping low if this is classed as entertaining? The chairman versus a midget? This match never actually happened with the interference of Finlay & JBL. Since no bell ever rang to start this I class it as a No-Contest.
Maria and some a**ehole bloke come down to the ring to bore us on the mic, Maria agrees to pose for Playboy.
Maria vs Beth Phoenix - That Beth certainly does look very masculine doesn't she? S***ty match with Phoenix on top the whole way, Maria got the win though.
Non-Title Match (AKA Cena's Last Chance - John Cena vs Randy Orton with HHH as special guest ref. Well this was pretty much your average WWE match. overly long, no action at all, Cena getting the win in about 15 minutes. HHH pedigreeing Cena was to be expected, likewise the one on Orton.
Well for a show that lasted 1 hour and 30 minutes you got 5 matches (well 4 because Vince's match never actually happened), LOTS of talking & video inserts for Wrestlemania. An average WWE show and their style certainly hasn't changed in the 3 + years I've been away. It doesn't make me want to watch another show, thats for sure.
RAW 18th Feb 08 - The Show opens with HHH coming down to bore us on the mic, he's interupted by Randy Orton (looking more like a gay pornstar than ever!), Orton is interupted from his rant by John Cena (still using that s***ty rapper gimmick after more than 3 years?) & Cena's rant is interupted by William Regal (that's some serious hair you got there, Regal!).
Money In The Bank Qualifier match, Jeff Hardy vs Snitsky - Well I've certainly seen both of these 2 before and on the face of it, it's a complete mismatch with Snitsky's size. Snitsky was on top for most of this match which was to be expected, Hardy got the eventual win and still looks a decent enough worker!
HBK (why is JR referring to him as a "young man" ? He's one of WWE's oldest these days!) comes down to announce Ric Flairs induction into the HOF.
Paul Burchill vs Super Crazy - Burchill I've never seen before, Crazy I've seen in WCW and WWE as part of the LWO when Eddie was still alive. The match itself was short and nothing to write home about with Super Crazy jobbing to Burchill big time. Crazy is much better than this match by a long chalk.
Big Show getting his nose bust, Mayweathers 3rd punch (the left) was the killer blow. I don't care what he was saying, its just s**t from "Creative".
Money In The Bank Qualifier match, Mr. Kennedy vs Val Venis. Wow, Val's still working for WWE? No idea who Kennedy is, never seen him before. He certainly likes his technical wrestling as most of his match was on the mat and he got the eventual win. It looks like WWE make their established talent job to the FNG's on a regular basis these days then?
Steel Cage Match - Mr McMahon vs Hornswoggle. Wow, they are stooping low if this is classed as entertaining? The chairman versus a midget? This match never actually happened with the interference of Finlay & JBL. Since no bell ever rang to start this I class it as a No-Contest.
Maria and some a**ehole bloke come down to the ring to bore us on the mic, Maria agrees to pose for Playboy.
Maria vs Beth Phoenix - That Beth certainly does look very masculine doesn't she? S***ty match with Phoenix on top the whole way, Maria got the win though.
Non-Title Match (AKA Cena's Last Chance - John Cena vs Randy Orton with HHH as special guest ref. Well this was pretty much your average WWE match. overly long, no action at all, Cena getting the win in about 15 minutes. HHH pedigreeing Cena was to be expected, likewise the one on Orton.
Well for a show that lasted 1 hour and 30 minutes you got 5 matches (well 4 because Vince's match never actually happened), LOTS of talking & video inserts for Wrestlemania. An average WWE show and their style certainly hasn't changed in the 3 + years I've been away. It doesn't make me want to watch another show, thats for sure.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
My TNA Monthly Catch-up, Feb-Mar 08
Once again it's that time of the month where I review the previous months Impacts & PPV. I call the action how I see it, the only views expressed within are my own & I have been known to swear & curse - real people generally do. These are reviewed as I watch them so I say what I think, I don't copy & paste others material. If you don't like my views then don't read them. I answer all feedback on the catch-ups. I only talk about stuff I find entertaining or likely to forward the brand of TNA, if it's s**t I'll either say so or not even mention it.
Impact 14th Feb 08 - Jim Cornette opens the show with Samoa Joe's signing. Christian Cage interrupts it.
Brother Devon vs Curry Man (Announcer VERY nearly said Christopher Daniels) & Sharkboy. Bubba wasn't allowed to wrestle this because he couldn't make the weight limit imposed after the last ppv. A short pretty bad match, Devon took the win after Bubba hit Curryman with the scales.
Abyss vs Scott Steiner - a match that never started, Abyss came down to the ring then turned around, walked back up the ramp, took off his mask & walked back down the tunnel. Steiner challenged anyone in the back & Petey Williams took him on. Steiner got the win after his valet interfered.
Non-Title Tag Team Revenge Match, AJ Styles & Tomko vs Samoa Joe & Christian Cage. Cage got knocked out backstage so Joe's partner was Kevin Nash. Tomko got the pin after Kurt Angle interfered.
Rellik vs Eric Young - another classic TNA mismatch that seemed to be a win for EY before the bell ever rang. Rellik took the shock win.
3 Way Exhibition Contest, Jimmy Rave vs Chris Sabin vs Homicide. Man this was confusing enough to know who was wrestling who as they all bought their tag partners & valets with them. S***ty match with Homicide getting a win off interference (of course).
Rhino bores us on the mic.
Non-title Knockout Street Fight - ODB vs Awesome Kong. This one started before Kong even got in the ring with ODB taking it to her. This is the kind of match that ODB actually could win against Kong in. Another badly timed break (NEVER have a break during a match!). ODB sold some seriously hard bumps in this one. ODB's clothesline into Gail Kim was predictable as was Kong's win.
Some seriously AWFUL storyline S**T showing Russo at work. 3 matches ending in interference and this pile of W**K. F**k off Russo!
Impact 21st Feb 08 - Tag Team Title Match, Kip James & Bullet Bob Armstrong vs Tomko & AJ Styles. As BG was injured by Styles at the last PPV, Kip was taking his place here. Bullet Bob made a good start & AJ was selling for him big time. Tomko took the win after Kip hit Bob with BG's crutch & VKM are officially done as a tagteam.
Kaz vs Rellik - no idea why this was booked. Rellik isn't over & him jobbing to Kaz isn't going to help Kaz's push either. Kaz got a clean win but this didn't need the run-in by Black Reign at all.
3 Way X-Division contest to confirm the #1 contender. Sonjay Dutt vs Johnny Devine vs Petey Williams. Predictable win went to Williams in a weak match. Less said the better. Utter S**T. Storyline video b**ls**t followed by interview storyline b**ls**t.
Sharkboy & Curry Man (speaking fluent Japanese backstage!) vs Team 3d. Again 3d were weighed prematch & this week Ray was ok but Devon was too heavy so we got yet another handicap match. This was a repeat of last weeks match so Russo hasn't had any new ideas in 7 days, Ray got the win after Devon hit Sharkboy in the head with the scales.
Knockout Tagteam match - Ms. Jacqueline & Roxxi Laveaux vs ODB & Gail Kim. After last weeks problems this was bound to be another way to further a rift between Kim & ODB. ODB worked this match the best but it wasn't good & it was very predictable with Kim hitting ODB with a dropkick by accident. Roxxi took the win for her team. Kim & ODB fought their way from ring to backstage afterwards. THAT was a better fight!
Non-title match - Kurt Angle vs Booker T. Booker is pretty lucky getting this match. Even at just over 5 mins long this was TOO long. And S**T. Robert Roode interfered & Angle got the win. This was the 2nd week in a row where matches either had bad finishes or wins came off interference. If TNA keep going this way they'll put themselves out of business. WWE won't have to bother.
Impact 28th Feb 08 - Booker T comes out to bore us on the mic.
Tag Match, Petey Williams & Scott Steiner vs Sonjay Dutt & Black Machismo. Another weak match with Williams getting the win after Steiner hit Dutt with a briefcase. Russo's 1 man destruction of TNA continues unabated.
Tag Match - Team 3d vs Curry Man & Sharkboy. This match AGAIN? This is the 3rd time we've seen it. Devon fails to make weight. Ray also fails to make weight. 3d get dq'd for failing weight so Sharkboy & Curry Man win without ever doing anything. Russo rapes TNA again.
Tag Match - Sharkboy & Curry Man vs Rellik & Black Reign. Curry Man got the best of this match but Sharkboy got the win for his team.
Robert Roode comes down to bore us on the mic.
Ladder Match for the World Drinking Championship belt - James Storm vs Eric Young. AWFUL match. Storm won after Jackie got the belt down for him. Yet another nail in TNA's coffin it seems.
Non-Title Knockout Match - Angelina Love vs Awesome Kong. An awful mismatch, Kong is obviously going to win. I was expecting short & c**p. C**p yes, unfortunately not short enough. Kong got the predicted win.
Non-Title Match, Kevin Nash vs Kurt Angle. This match showed how long it's been since Nash worked a proper match. He couldn't sell & he looked awful, Angle struggled to carry him. This was another weak Russo inspired finish with Angle getting the win off a low blow. Possibly the WORST Impact show I've seen since I started watching 4 years ago.
Impact 6th Mar 08 - Street Fight, AJ Styles vs Kevin Nash - Nash got the win. Less said the better.
Destination X Over The Top Battle Royal - The Motor City Machine Guns vs The Rock & Rave Infection (wow, I finally used their team name!) vs Jay Lethal vs LAX vs Black Reign & Rellik vs Eric Young vs Team 3d. Those not introduced on camera are Sharkboy, Curry Man & Petey Williams. Team 3d fail to make weight yet again and are DQ'd before the match starts. Homicide is eliminated by Chris Sabin. Hernandez eliminated Alex Shelley. Hernandez eliminated Chris Sabin. Petey Williams eliminated Hernandez (with an outside assist from Scott Steiner). Petey Williams eliminated Eric Young (after a f**king HUGE assist from Steiner!). Curry Man & Sharkboy eliminated Lance Hoyt. Rellik eliminated Sharkboy. Jay Lethal eliminated Black Reign. Petey Williams eliminated Jay Lethal after a Canadian Destroyer. Curry Man eliminated Petey Williams. Curry Man eliminated Jimmy Rave. Curry Man eliminated Rellik winning the match & got to choose the stipulation for his Destination X match. Sharkboy calls the stipulation if 3d lose they leave TNA and that the match is a Fish Market Street Fight.
1st Blood Match, Tomko vs Samoa Joe - Tomko won. AWFUL match. Backstage b**ls**t.
Rhino vs Judas Mesias - Rhino won. C**P match.
Non-Title Knockouts Match - Salinas vs Awesome Kong. Having never wrestled ANYONE in TNA as yet, how the F**K did Salinas get this match? Even with LAX, Salinas was not going to win. Kong got the predicted win in this short & rubbish match.
6 Sides Of Steel Match - Christian Cage vs Kurt Angle. At best the most we could expect from this match was a quick win. Sadly with 20 mins left in the show that wasn't going to happen. Neither guy is brilliant in cages but Christian is the better worker here and carried the match to be honest. Cage got the eventual win.
Destination X 2008 PPV - 3 way Tag Match to decide the #1 contenders - LAX vs The Rock & Rave Infection vs The Motor City Machine Guns. This wasn't a great match but the Guns made it better by a great deal. They had both the best & took the worst of the match & it was a toss-up if it was going to be them or LAX (again?) to become contenders. The Guns were the best team by a country mile, made the best moves & took the best bumps. LAX took a win they truly didn't earn, work for or deserve.
X-Division Title Match - Petey Williams (with Steiner's valet Rhaka Khan) vs Jay (still running this s**t gimmick) Lethal. As Williams has someone in his corner whose already cheated a few wins for Steiner this one sounded like a foregone conclusion before it started. This match was even, well worked but ran way too long by a huge amount. It was actually clean until Steiners pointless interference & Val trying to point it out slowed the match down at exactly the WRONG time. Lethal got a well deserved win.
Tag Match, Black Reign & Rellik vs Kaz & Eric Young - Here's a match I wanted finished before it even started having seen the participants. Kaz made the best of this match but it was still F**KING AWFUL, the whole EY "Super Hero" thing was a bad idea. Young got the pin that he didn't deserve, Kaz should have got this win as it's him their pushing.
TNA Knockouts Womens Title 3 way Match - ODB vs Awesome Kong vs Gail Kim. The outcome of this was always going to be Kong winning & either ODB or Kim causing the other to get pinned. Obviously ODB & Kim were going to double-team Kong but you knew at some point either Kim was going to hit ODB or ODB was going to hit Kim for Kong to steal the win. When a match is this predictable its not worth watching. Kong took the win off ODB retaining the title after interference from her valet.
Fish Market Street Fight Tag Match - Team 3d vs Curry Man. After Cornette's announcement that if 3d make the weight it'd be the last time they have to but if they don't their sacked you knew 3d were going to make weight which they did. From the start Sharkboy & Curry Man had the best of this match and 3d sold like crazy for them both. This was looked like it was always going to be 3d's match as if they lost they were leaving TNA. This match certainly got Sharkboy & Curry Man over a great deal more than they already were (and that's quite a lot!) but it was just a matter of when 3d were going to get their pin. Sharkboy took the surprising pin off Devon & 3d don't have a job in TNA any more! What are the odds that stipulation is "forgotten" & Team 3d don't lose their jobs especially after the fight with the guys in the crowd?
A Stand By Your Man Strap Match, Booker T & Traci Brooks vs Robert Roode & Peyton Banks - Winner gets to strap their counterpart on the opposing team. Booker was probably always going to win this, especially as both Booker & Brooks had already taken a strapping last week on tv. Roode got shock the win after using handcuffs as improvised brass knucks. Banks got to lash Brooks 10 times. Sharmell came back.
Elevation X, Rhino vs James Storm - Neither guy is bodily suited to this match so why is was booked is beyond me. The fact that this started in the ring & stayed there a long time was a bad indicator of exactly how this match was going to go. Rhino got the win in this AWFUL match.
6 Man Tag Match, AJ Styles, Tomko & Kurt Angle vs Kevin Nash, Samoa Joe & Christian Cage. After reviewing the tapes of Angle's match last week it was decided not to overturn the decision of who got the advantage of 3 on 2 for the 1st 5 minutes. Angle came out after the 5 minutes elapsed & Joe was waiting for him at the bottom of the ramp. Joe took the eventual win in this pretty rubbish match. This has got to have been TNA's worst PPV to date, the women's match was way too predictable & the rest of the card was just scrappy. TNA are way better than this and I hope they remember that.
Impact 14th Feb 08 - Jim Cornette opens the show with Samoa Joe's signing. Christian Cage interrupts it.
Brother Devon vs Curry Man (Announcer VERY nearly said Christopher Daniels) & Sharkboy. Bubba wasn't allowed to wrestle this because he couldn't make the weight limit imposed after the last ppv. A short pretty bad match, Devon took the win after Bubba hit Curryman with the scales.
Abyss vs Scott Steiner - a match that never started, Abyss came down to the ring then turned around, walked back up the ramp, took off his mask & walked back down the tunnel. Steiner challenged anyone in the back & Petey Williams took him on. Steiner got the win after his valet interfered.
Non-Title Tag Team Revenge Match, AJ Styles & Tomko vs Samoa Joe & Christian Cage. Cage got knocked out backstage so Joe's partner was Kevin Nash. Tomko got the pin after Kurt Angle interfered.
Rellik vs Eric Young - another classic TNA mismatch that seemed to be a win for EY before the bell ever rang. Rellik took the shock win.
3 Way Exhibition Contest, Jimmy Rave vs Chris Sabin vs Homicide. Man this was confusing enough to know who was wrestling who as they all bought their tag partners & valets with them. S***ty match with Homicide getting a win off interference (of course).
Rhino bores us on the mic.
Non-title Knockout Street Fight - ODB vs Awesome Kong. This one started before Kong even got in the ring with ODB taking it to her. This is the kind of match that ODB actually could win against Kong in. Another badly timed break (NEVER have a break during a match!). ODB sold some seriously hard bumps in this one. ODB's clothesline into Gail Kim was predictable as was Kong's win.
Some seriously AWFUL storyline S**T showing Russo at work. 3 matches ending in interference and this pile of W**K. F**k off Russo!
Impact 21st Feb 08 - Tag Team Title Match, Kip James & Bullet Bob Armstrong vs Tomko & AJ Styles. As BG was injured by Styles at the last PPV, Kip was taking his place here. Bullet Bob made a good start & AJ was selling for him big time. Tomko took the win after Kip hit Bob with BG's crutch & VKM are officially done as a tagteam.
Kaz vs Rellik - no idea why this was booked. Rellik isn't over & him jobbing to Kaz isn't going to help Kaz's push either. Kaz got a clean win but this didn't need the run-in by Black Reign at all.
3 Way X-Division contest to confirm the #1 contender. Sonjay Dutt vs Johnny Devine vs Petey Williams. Predictable win went to Williams in a weak match. Less said the better. Utter S**T. Storyline video b**ls**t followed by interview storyline b**ls**t.
Sharkboy & Curry Man (speaking fluent Japanese backstage!) vs Team 3d. Again 3d were weighed prematch & this week Ray was ok but Devon was too heavy so we got yet another handicap match. This was a repeat of last weeks match so Russo hasn't had any new ideas in 7 days, Ray got the win after Devon hit Sharkboy in the head with the scales.
Knockout Tagteam match - Ms. Jacqueline & Roxxi Laveaux vs ODB & Gail Kim. After last weeks problems this was bound to be another way to further a rift between Kim & ODB. ODB worked this match the best but it wasn't good & it was very predictable with Kim hitting ODB with a dropkick by accident. Roxxi took the win for her team. Kim & ODB fought their way from ring to backstage afterwards. THAT was a better fight!
Non-title match - Kurt Angle vs Booker T. Booker is pretty lucky getting this match. Even at just over 5 mins long this was TOO long. And S**T. Robert Roode interfered & Angle got the win. This was the 2nd week in a row where matches either had bad finishes or wins came off interference. If TNA keep going this way they'll put themselves out of business. WWE won't have to bother.
Impact 28th Feb 08 - Booker T comes out to bore us on the mic.
Tag Match, Petey Williams & Scott Steiner vs Sonjay Dutt & Black Machismo. Another weak match with Williams getting the win after Steiner hit Dutt with a briefcase. Russo's 1 man destruction of TNA continues unabated.
Tag Match - Team 3d vs Curry Man & Sharkboy. This match AGAIN? This is the 3rd time we've seen it. Devon fails to make weight. Ray also fails to make weight. 3d get dq'd for failing weight so Sharkboy & Curry Man win without ever doing anything. Russo rapes TNA again.
Tag Match - Sharkboy & Curry Man vs Rellik & Black Reign. Curry Man got the best of this match but Sharkboy got the win for his team.
Robert Roode comes down to bore us on the mic.
Ladder Match for the World Drinking Championship belt - James Storm vs Eric Young. AWFUL match. Storm won after Jackie got the belt down for him. Yet another nail in TNA's coffin it seems.
Non-Title Knockout Match - Angelina Love vs Awesome Kong. An awful mismatch, Kong is obviously going to win. I was expecting short & c**p. C**p yes, unfortunately not short enough. Kong got the predicted win.
Non-Title Match, Kevin Nash vs Kurt Angle. This match showed how long it's been since Nash worked a proper match. He couldn't sell & he looked awful, Angle struggled to carry him. This was another weak Russo inspired finish with Angle getting the win off a low blow. Possibly the WORST Impact show I've seen since I started watching 4 years ago.
Impact 6th Mar 08 - Street Fight, AJ Styles vs Kevin Nash - Nash got the win. Less said the better.
Destination X Over The Top Battle Royal - The Motor City Machine Guns vs The Rock & Rave Infection (wow, I finally used their team name!) vs Jay Lethal vs LAX vs Black Reign & Rellik vs Eric Young vs Team 3d. Those not introduced on camera are Sharkboy, Curry Man & Petey Williams. Team 3d fail to make weight yet again and are DQ'd before the match starts. Homicide is eliminated by Chris Sabin. Hernandez eliminated Alex Shelley. Hernandez eliminated Chris Sabin. Petey Williams eliminated Hernandez (with an outside assist from Scott Steiner). Petey Williams eliminated Eric Young (after a f**king HUGE assist from Steiner!). Curry Man & Sharkboy eliminated Lance Hoyt. Rellik eliminated Sharkboy. Jay Lethal eliminated Black Reign. Petey Williams eliminated Jay Lethal after a Canadian Destroyer. Curry Man eliminated Petey Williams. Curry Man eliminated Jimmy Rave. Curry Man eliminated Rellik winning the match & got to choose the stipulation for his Destination X match. Sharkboy calls the stipulation if 3d lose they leave TNA and that the match is a Fish Market Street Fight.
1st Blood Match, Tomko vs Samoa Joe - Tomko won. AWFUL match. Backstage b**ls**t.
Rhino vs Judas Mesias - Rhino won. C**P match.
Non-Title Knockouts Match - Salinas vs Awesome Kong. Having never wrestled ANYONE in TNA as yet, how the F**K did Salinas get this match? Even with LAX, Salinas was not going to win. Kong got the predicted win in this short & rubbish match.
6 Sides Of Steel Match - Christian Cage vs Kurt Angle. At best the most we could expect from this match was a quick win. Sadly with 20 mins left in the show that wasn't going to happen. Neither guy is brilliant in cages but Christian is the better worker here and carried the match to be honest. Cage got the eventual win.
Destination X 2008 PPV - 3 way Tag Match to decide the #1 contenders - LAX vs The Rock & Rave Infection vs The Motor City Machine Guns. This wasn't a great match but the Guns made it better by a great deal. They had both the best & took the worst of the match & it was a toss-up if it was going to be them or LAX (again?) to become contenders. The Guns were the best team by a country mile, made the best moves & took the best bumps. LAX took a win they truly didn't earn, work for or deserve.
X-Division Title Match - Petey Williams (with Steiner's valet Rhaka Khan) vs Jay (still running this s**t gimmick) Lethal. As Williams has someone in his corner whose already cheated a few wins for Steiner this one sounded like a foregone conclusion before it started. This match was even, well worked but ran way too long by a huge amount. It was actually clean until Steiners pointless interference & Val trying to point it out slowed the match down at exactly the WRONG time. Lethal got a well deserved win.
Tag Match, Black Reign & Rellik vs Kaz & Eric Young - Here's a match I wanted finished before it even started having seen the participants. Kaz made the best of this match but it was still F**KING AWFUL, the whole EY "Super Hero" thing was a bad idea. Young got the pin that he didn't deserve, Kaz should have got this win as it's him their pushing.
TNA Knockouts Womens Title 3 way Match - ODB vs Awesome Kong vs Gail Kim. The outcome of this was always going to be Kong winning & either ODB or Kim causing the other to get pinned. Obviously ODB & Kim were going to double-team Kong but you knew at some point either Kim was going to hit ODB or ODB was going to hit Kim for Kong to steal the win. When a match is this predictable its not worth watching. Kong took the win off ODB retaining the title after interference from her valet.
Fish Market Street Fight Tag Match - Team 3d vs Curry Man. After Cornette's announcement that if 3d make the weight it'd be the last time they have to but if they don't their sacked you knew 3d were going to make weight which they did. From the start Sharkboy & Curry Man had the best of this match and 3d sold like crazy for them both. This was looked like it was always going to be 3d's match as if they lost they were leaving TNA. This match certainly got Sharkboy & Curry Man over a great deal more than they already were (and that's quite a lot!) but it was just a matter of when 3d were going to get their pin. Sharkboy took the surprising pin off Devon & 3d don't have a job in TNA any more! What are the odds that stipulation is "forgotten" & Team 3d don't lose their jobs especially after the fight with the guys in the crowd?
A Stand By Your Man Strap Match, Booker T & Traci Brooks vs Robert Roode & Peyton Banks - Winner gets to strap their counterpart on the opposing team. Booker was probably always going to win this, especially as both Booker & Brooks had already taken a strapping last week on tv. Roode got shock the win after using handcuffs as improvised brass knucks. Banks got to lash Brooks 10 times. Sharmell came back.
Elevation X, Rhino vs James Storm - Neither guy is bodily suited to this match so why is was booked is beyond me. The fact that this started in the ring & stayed there a long time was a bad indicator of exactly how this match was going to go. Rhino got the win in this AWFUL match.
6 Man Tag Match, AJ Styles, Tomko & Kurt Angle vs Kevin Nash, Samoa Joe & Christian Cage. After reviewing the tapes of Angle's match last week it was decided not to overturn the decision of who got the advantage of 3 on 2 for the 1st 5 minutes. Angle came out after the 5 minutes elapsed & Joe was waiting for him at the bottom of the ramp. Joe took the eventual win in this pretty rubbish match. This has got to have been TNA's worst PPV to date, the women's match was way too predictable & the rest of the card was just scrappy. TNA are way better than this and I hope they remember that.
Friday, January 4, 2008
My TNA Monthly Catch-up, Jan - Feb 08
Yes indeed ladies and germs it is that time of the month again where I review the previous months Impacts and PPV. Unlike certain people who "write" reviews (if you can call cut N pasting someone else's work wholesale actually writing a review) in these newsgroups I actually watch what I'm reviewing. Also if I don't know something about a worker, I look it up (Evad, take note!) . The views stated within are my own from my very own brain and I don't like something I'll say so, I'm not a sheep. If I feel something is boring or not relevant to the advancement of TNA I won't even bother mentioning it. I am liable to curse, swear and use other such colourful idioms, real people generally speak that way. If you don't like what I have to say then don't read the reviews, its that simple! All feedback on the catch-ups is most welcome and I will respond to every comment made.
TNA Global Impact From Tokyo, Japan 4th Jan 08 - Why was this aired on 17th Jan, almost 2 weeks after the fact? TNA is working with New Japan and we get lots of chatter/background information.
Petey Williams, AJ Styles & Christian Cage were in a 6 man tag which they won.
Abyss had a thumbtack match which he lost.
Team 3d had a tables tag match which they won.
I'd name check the Japs but I never saw any names written down.
Tomko & Giant Bernard (A-Train) fought The Steiner Brothers and won.
Kurt Angle defended his IWGP heavyweight title against Yuji Nagata. This was the only match we got to see all of. The Japs obviously like their technical/mat wrestling as that's what was mostly being done in this match. Any US crowd would have been chanting "BORING" in less than 2 minutes. Angle won off the Ankle lock. A decent display of technical wrestling but it was WAY too long with far too much mat work for a western audience. I would have liked to have seen more of all the other matches and feel this show was a bit of a gyp to be honest. Someone said they were doing a dvd of the whole show, I assume that's why they held back all but 1 match.
Impact 10th Jan 08 - Tag match, Senshi & Elix Skipper vs The Motor City Machine Guns. A fairly short but very good and fast paced match with Shelley & Sabin taking a well deserved win.
Christian Cage bores us on the mic.
Judas Mesias vs Chris Harris - The best you could hope for here was a REALLY short match as neither guy has much talent, I'll be honest I watched most of this on fast forward so it didn't get much of my attention, Mesias got the win.
Tag Match - VKM vs Petey Williams (now being nicknamed Maple Leaf Muscle) & Sonjay Dutt. This is a bit of a mismatch to be honest, 2 X-Division guys against 2 heavyweights. Steiner stealing his Feast Or Fired case back was a bit of a pointless thing (it's already on record who won what, so it doesn't matter who has which case), Williams went off after his case leaving Dutt alone to get the win off Kip for his team. Sonjay kissing SoCal Val (for the 2nd time now) is setting up a match in the future against Jay Lethal.
More boring backstage s**te.
Robert Roode comes out to bore us on the mic. Miss Brooks gets fired (that's the set-up for the superfan/stalker to be his valet then) then gets beaten down by the superfan coming out from the crowd. Roode introduces her as her replacement , Miss Banks. (like I predicted in fact!)
Return Tag Team Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs LAX with their new valet Salinas, LAX getting the eventual win.
Sharkboy vs Tomko - This whole "injured" Sharkboy angle is very dull and I really can't see where their going with it at all. Tomko got an obvious win in a very dull and short squash match.
Some c**p from The Angle Alliance.
Main Event TNA Knockout Womens Title Rematch - Awesome Kong vs Gail Kim. Isn't this actually Awesome Kong's 2nd rematch? Kong had someone (who is later referred to as Raisha Saeed, aka former WWE worker Melissa Anderson) with her (like she needs the help?) and jumped Kim before the introductions were ever done. Lots of out of ring stuff, Kong going through a wall on the ramp. Kim pulled a great ddt off the top turnbuckle. Ref Hebner f**ked up by getting in Kim's way. Kong made 3 powerbombs and finally wins the title.
Impact 17th Jan 08 - The Motor City Machine Guns & Jay Lethal accept Team 3d's challenge.
Tomko vs Eric Young - Another seemingly pointless match for Tomko who took the win.
TNA Knockout Womens Match - OBD vs Angelina Love. This was a really good match, both women showing good skills and taking great bumps. ODB won off a Davey Boy Smith style running powerslam.
Senshi vs Kaz - Considering the ability of these 2 guys this was an incredibly weak match with Kaz taking the win. Black Reign jumps him afterwards, I don't care why.
Lance Hoyt vs Abyss - This match never really got started with James Mitchell interrupting the match. Abyss won after the restart, and the secret is revealed - James Mitchell is his father. Very Star Wars.
Robert Roode (with new valet Peyton Banks) vs Sonjay Dutt - Sonjay's the better of these 2, showing his talent well but Roode took the win in a poor match.
BG James picks his tag partner, his father Bullet Bob Armstrong.
Angle bores us on the mic.
3 way Elimination Match - AJ Styles vs Samoa Joe vs Christian Cage. Its a bit of a weird one this, If Joe wins he gets a title shot, If Cage wins he gets a title shot but if Styles wins he earns Kurt Angle 2 weeks off. Joe got eliminated for throwing a chair out of the ring that he'd never used. (a bit of b**ls**t IMHO), Cage got the win but this match was far too long for my liking.
Impact 24th Jan 08 - Kevin Nash comes down to bore us on the mic.
Tag Match - James Storm & Robert Roode with Peyton Banks (dressed like Miss Brooks Exactly Like I Predicted!) vs Eric Young & Sonjay Dutt. A really poor match, Roode took the win.
Jay Lethal wins best X-Division worker of 2007. Lethal looks like he finally dropped the Macho Gimmick.
Elix Skipper vs Sharkboy dressed in a Stone Cold Style waistcoat. Both guys worked well, Skipper seemed happy to put Sharkboy over and sold well when Sharkboy was on top. Sharkboy took the win (even his music sounds like SCSA's). Is it just me or does Sharkboy's SCSCA impression sound exactly like BG James?
Gail Kim wins 2007 Knockout of the year, getting a beatdown from Kong too.
1 Fall Street Fight for the X-Division Title - Johnny Devine vs Jay Lethal. Basically a hardcore no rules match. A nice ddt by Lethal onto a chair but Devine got the win and the belt.
2007 Most memorable moment of TNA - Booker coming to TNA wins.
Tag Contest - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs Tiger Mask (from New Japan) & Curry Man (AKA Chris Daniels). It's nice to see Tiger Mask back in TNA & even better to see Curry Man better known as The Fallen Angel, Christopher Daniels under the mask. A damn good match with Tiger Mask getting the win from a Flying Headbutt.
Samoa Joe wins 2007 TNA MVP, very well deserved too.
Tag Title Match - Team 3d vs The Motor City Machine Guns vs Tomko & AJ Styles. When the F**K did this turn into a 3 way dance? In the odd rules they said you can't tag you own partner or wrestle your own partner. With rules like that this match was always going to be messy. Tomko got the win and his team retained the belts after AJ left Tomko alone due to helping Karen Angle back to the locker room.
Impact 31st Jan 08 - Team 3d come down to bore us on the mic.
Tag Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs Petey Williams & Scott Steiner. Hoyt totally did not want to sell the Hurricanrana off Williams. Hoyt didn't want to sell a kick off Steiner either, is he going soft? Rave got the win after Steiner clobbered Williams with one of the cases.
BJ James vs Hernandez - Hernandez got the win after Roxxi threw powder into Kip's eyes by mistake, Roxxi gets fired from VKM.
Judas Mesias vs Corey Chambers (a totally unknown jobber) in a total squash match.
Sharkboy issues an open challenge, no takers.
3 Way Knockouts Match - Roxxi Laveaux vs Angelina Love vs ODB. Not a great match for the girls, Love got the win.
Mixed Tag Match - Robert Roode & Peyton Banks & James Storm vs Sonjay Dutt & Traci Brooks (back to her original name again like I predicted) & Eric Young. A very weak match, Roode got the pin off Young for the win.
Kurt Angle vs Tomko with AJ Styles as guest ref. THIS was a main event? In what universe was this considered worthy to main event? A huge pile of garbage with Tomko taking the win off the worlds slowest 3 count after Christian Cage nailed Kurt with his belt.
Impact 7th Feb 08 - Robert Roode vs Jay Lethal - never started, Roode got jumped by Booker T before Roode ever made it to the ring.
Non-title Knockout Match - Traci Brooks vs Awesome Kong. Well this was going to be VERY short. Expected to be a squash match. Traci got a lot longer out of Kong than most of the women normally do. Kong took the expected win.
A 4 Corners Capture Misty Match - Kaz vs Black Reign. TNA management have officially gone crazy, they may as well have let Vince Russo take a s**t into the ring on live tv. This is a Rat on a Pole match. It's THAT F**KING STUPID! The 1st 2 boxes had traps in them both Kaz & Black Reign finding 1 each (and both totally overselling the "pain"), Black Reign found the 3rd trap, Kaz found Misty winning the match. Black Reign hit Kaz with his darkness falls weapon and reclaimed Misty.
X Division Title Match - Johnny Devine vs Homicide of LAX. Devine was alone but Homicide had the new valet Salinas. Homicide had this one in the bag until Team 3d interfered, match ending a DQ for outside interference.
Tag Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs Curry Man (AKA Chris Daniels) & Sharkboy (carrying on in his new SCSA persona which I don't much care for). As Curry Man, Daniels obviously doesn't mind jobbing but he's definitely getting over in the mask for sure. Sharkboy took the pin for his team.
Tiger Mask vs AJ Styles - Tiger Mask getting yet another chance to improve TNA/New Japan links. Styles was showing some of his old magic, Tiger Mask showed some great aerial moves (loved that standing moonsault!). Styles took a good win looking better than he has in a while.
Main Event, Christian Cage vs Judas Mesias - How is Mesias worthy of a main event? This was never going to be much to write home about really, was it? Cage is a good enough worker but not even he could carry this match as long as they ran it. Mesias simply hasn't got the skillset to work a match of this length, he's strictly a short match person. Cage took the win, Abyss had chased James Mitchell backstage with his arm wrapped in barbed wire and then came back after the pin to beatdown Mesias with the barbed wire. Styles came down to beatdown Cage as well, Angle had to rescue Styles from a sharpshooter & Tomko had to save Cage from a double team.
Against All Odds PPV 2008 - Tag Title Match - BG James & Bullet Bob Armstrong vs AJ Styles & Tomko. A title match to start off a PPV? Aren't these usually saved until the end of the card? On the face of it the champs looked like they would win but Styles & Tomko have been having problems recently. For 67, Bob works damn well! He's a darn sight more talented than Pacman Jones ever was, thats for certain. He took good bumps off both Tomko & Styles. Both guys sold convincingly for him as well. BG looked a lot better than he has done for a while but Tomko got the win after Styles hit BG in the knee hard. Loved the "Old Age Outlaws" sign in the crowd too.
TNA Knockout Grudge Match - Peyton Banks vs Traci Brooks. This was only going to be a scrap as Banks has never shown any actual wrestling ability yet. Banks has let her hair dye fade (she now has brown hair, having gone from blonde to black like Traci again pretty much like I predicted). Banks did show a few moves but not many. Traci got the better of this, looked better, had a wider arsenal of moves & looked the better trained of the 2 women. Brooks got the eventual win.
Case vs Case Match - Petey Williams vs Scott Steiner, the winner getting both a heavyweight title shot & an X-Division title shot. If we're honest they are STILL dragging out the Feast Or Fired angle here. And that was s**t. At best I was hoping for a really short match with a quick pin. These guys have totally opposing styles and really DON'T belong in a match together. An overly long match, Steiner got the win thanks to a hot black chick distracting Williams.
Drinking Championship Belt Match - James Storm vs Eric Young. Eric Young as a moronic imbecile is WAY old now, can they please kill the "scared of my own pyro" thing? Here's a match that doesn't belong on TV, let alone a PPV. Rhyno gored Storm behind the refs back, Eric Young took the win and retains his belt. Rhyno is back!
TNA Knockout Womens Title Match - Awesome Kong vs ODB. Why was this so low in the card? It certainly should have been higher than the non-title barbed wire match. I so wanted ODB to win this match, she's an ideal person to be Womens Champion. ODB might not have the same height or weight as Kong but she has a huge amount of spirit & fight and I didn't expect her to take a beating timidly from Kong. Is it just me or when ODB screams does she remind anyone else of Bobcat Goldthwait? If Chyna were to consider a comeback she'd have good people to work with in TNA like ODB and Kong. ODB's slam off the top turnbuckle was pretty awesome but Kong got the win thanks to a distraction by Raisha Saeed. ODB had a great match though.
Barbed Wire Massacre 2 - Abyss vs Judas Mesias. Basically a no rope barbed wire match. So serious the main stadium wouldn't let them hold it there, they claimed. So we cross over to The Impact Zone. (This one was SO obviously taped after the last Impact show, the exact same crowd was there. Mitchell had even changed his suit to try & convince us it wasn't the same day). I honestly didn't expect to see Mesias go on the wire very much with his ring clothes. We saw the use of a barbed wire chair, & several barbed wire boards. Hebner was VERY badly out of position after Abyss's 2 Black Hole Slams on Mitchell & Mesias. Abyss got a well deserved win after a Black Hole Slam into a barbed wire board on the canvas.
1 Fall Grudge Match - Robert Roode vs Booker T. Peyton appeared to have recovered from her match with Traci. I didn't expect to see anything fancy from Booker here, just aggression. Booker is in yet another PPV pretty high up the card as well. This match was way too long, getting into silly territory when Roode went backstage. The result was a double count-out (after a match THIS long? Are you S***TING ME?) but Booker took it back to his car.
6 Man Hardcore Street Fight for the X-Division Championship - Team 3d & Johnny Devine vs Jay Lethal & The Motor City Machine Guns. Stipulations are if 3d win, the X-Division disbands. If Lethal & Co win TNA will create a weight limit of 275 lbs for all workers. Obviously this result was a forgone conclusion before the match ever started. TNA were hardly going disband the X-Division who not only fill more than half the TNA roster, they are also one of TNA's biggest selling points so this was always going to be a win for Lethal & Co. The ref was very badly out of position to make a count after the triple Tornado DDT. Lethal & The Guns were ahead until then. For those wondering, SoCal Val is more than able to take bumps, she's been working a few Indy feds for a while (Oh, and FYI her real middle name is actually Elizabeth!). I'm not sure if they were using this to set-up up her eventual TNA in-ring debut to wrestle or for her to become his valet. Lethal took the win off Devine with a flying elbow through a table winning for his team, saving the X-Division & winning the X-Division Title again finally taking it back from Team 3d.
Heavyweight Championship Title - Kurt Angle vs Christian Cage with Samoa Joe as special guest enforcer. Alarm bells should have been ringing, hearing the words Special Guest Enforcer as historically they normally always screw someone out of a title. I assume Joe's role was to stop Styles or Tomko interfering? This match was way too long and way too boring for not only the main event but the Heavyweight title. Joe's main contribution seemed to be stopping Angle using a chair, filling in for the ref when he went down & stopping Styles. Tomko did a backbreaker on Cage while Joe was removing Styles and Angle took the win after reviving the ref once Tomko had gone.
TNA Global Impact From Tokyo, Japan 4th Jan 08 - Why was this aired on 17th Jan, almost 2 weeks after the fact? TNA is working with New Japan and we get lots of chatter/background information.
Petey Williams, AJ Styles & Christian Cage were in a 6 man tag which they won.
Abyss had a thumbtack match which he lost.
Team 3d had a tables tag match which they won.
I'd name check the Japs but I never saw any names written down.
Tomko & Giant Bernard (A-Train) fought The Steiner Brothers and won.
Kurt Angle defended his IWGP heavyweight title against Yuji Nagata. This was the only match we got to see all of. The Japs obviously like their technical/mat wrestling as that's what was mostly being done in this match. Any US crowd would have been chanting "BORING" in less than 2 minutes. Angle won off the Ankle lock. A decent display of technical wrestling but it was WAY too long with far too much mat work for a western audience. I would have liked to have seen more of all the other matches and feel this show was a bit of a gyp to be honest. Someone said they were doing a dvd of the whole show, I assume that's why they held back all but 1 match.
Impact 10th Jan 08 - Tag match, Senshi & Elix Skipper vs The Motor City Machine Guns. A fairly short but very good and fast paced match with Shelley & Sabin taking a well deserved win.
Christian Cage bores us on the mic.
Judas Mesias vs Chris Harris - The best you could hope for here was a REALLY short match as neither guy has much talent, I'll be honest I watched most of this on fast forward so it didn't get much of my attention, Mesias got the win.
Tag Match - VKM vs Petey Williams (now being nicknamed Maple Leaf Muscle) & Sonjay Dutt. This is a bit of a mismatch to be honest, 2 X-Division guys against 2 heavyweights. Steiner stealing his Feast Or Fired case back was a bit of a pointless thing (it's already on record who won what, so it doesn't matter who has which case), Williams went off after his case leaving Dutt alone to get the win off Kip for his team. Sonjay kissing SoCal Val (for the 2nd time now) is setting up a match in the future against Jay Lethal.
More boring backstage s**te.
Robert Roode comes out to bore us on the mic. Miss Brooks gets fired (that's the set-up for the superfan/stalker to be his valet then) then gets beaten down by the superfan coming out from the crowd. Roode introduces her as her replacement , Miss Banks. (like I predicted in fact!)
Return Tag Team Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs LAX with their new valet Salinas, LAX getting the eventual win.
Sharkboy vs Tomko - This whole "injured" Sharkboy angle is very dull and I really can't see where their going with it at all. Tomko got an obvious win in a very dull and short squash match.
Some c**p from The Angle Alliance.
Main Event TNA Knockout Womens Title Rematch - Awesome Kong vs Gail Kim. Isn't this actually Awesome Kong's 2nd rematch? Kong had someone (who is later referred to as Raisha Saeed, aka former WWE worker Melissa Anderson) with her (like she needs the help?) and jumped Kim before the introductions were ever done. Lots of out of ring stuff, Kong going through a wall on the ramp. Kim pulled a great ddt off the top turnbuckle. Ref Hebner f**ked up by getting in Kim's way. Kong made 3 powerbombs and finally wins the title.
Impact 17th Jan 08 - The Motor City Machine Guns & Jay Lethal accept Team 3d's challenge.
Tomko vs Eric Young - Another seemingly pointless match for Tomko who took the win.
TNA Knockout Womens Match - OBD vs Angelina Love. This was a really good match, both women showing good skills and taking great bumps. ODB won off a Davey Boy Smith style running powerslam.
Senshi vs Kaz - Considering the ability of these 2 guys this was an incredibly weak match with Kaz taking the win. Black Reign jumps him afterwards, I don't care why.
Lance Hoyt vs Abyss - This match never really got started with James Mitchell interrupting the match. Abyss won after the restart, and the secret is revealed - James Mitchell is his father. Very Star Wars.
Robert Roode (with new valet Peyton Banks) vs Sonjay Dutt - Sonjay's the better of these 2, showing his talent well but Roode took the win in a poor match.
BG James picks his tag partner, his father Bullet Bob Armstrong.
Angle bores us on the mic.
3 way Elimination Match - AJ Styles vs Samoa Joe vs Christian Cage. Its a bit of a weird one this, If Joe wins he gets a title shot, If Cage wins he gets a title shot but if Styles wins he earns Kurt Angle 2 weeks off. Joe got eliminated for throwing a chair out of the ring that he'd never used. (a bit of b**ls**t IMHO), Cage got the win but this match was far too long for my liking.
Impact 24th Jan 08 - Kevin Nash comes down to bore us on the mic.
Tag Match - James Storm & Robert Roode with Peyton Banks (dressed like Miss Brooks Exactly Like I Predicted!) vs Eric Young & Sonjay Dutt. A really poor match, Roode took the win.
Jay Lethal wins best X-Division worker of 2007. Lethal looks like he finally dropped the Macho Gimmick.
Elix Skipper vs Sharkboy dressed in a Stone Cold Style waistcoat. Both guys worked well, Skipper seemed happy to put Sharkboy over and sold well when Sharkboy was on top. Sharkboy took the win (even his music sounds like SCSA's). Is it just me or does Sharkboy's SCSCA impression sound exactly like BG James?
Gail Kim wins 2007 Knockout of the year, getting a beatdown from Kong too.
1 Fall Street Fight for the X-Division Title - Johnny Devine vs Jay Lethal. Basically a hardcore no rules match. A nice ddt by Lethal onto a chair but Devine got the win and the belt.
2007 Most memorable moment of TNA - Booker coming to TNA wins.
Tag Contest - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs Tiger Mask (from New Japan) & Curry Man (AKA Chris Daniels). It's nice to see Tiger Mask back in TNA & even better to see Curry Man better known as The Fallen Angel, Christopher Daniels under the mask. A damn good match with Tiger Mask getting the win from a Flying Headbutt.
Samoa Joe wins 2007 TNA MVP, very well deserved too.
Tag Title Match - Team 3d vs The Motor City Machine Guns vs Tomko & AJ Styles. When the F**K did this turn into a 3 way dance? In the odd rules they said you can't tag you own partner or wrestle your own partner. With rules like that this match was always going to be messy. Tomko got the win and his team retained the belts after AJ left Tomko alone due to helping Karen Angle back to the locker room.
Impact 31st Jan 08 - Team 3d come down to bore us on the mic.
Tag Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs Petey Williams & Scott Steiner. Hoyt totally did not want to sell the Hurricanrana off Williams. Hoyt didn't want to sell a kick off Steiner either, is he going soft? Rave got the win after Steiner clobbered Williams with one of the cases.
BJ James vs Hernandez - Hernandez got the win after Roxxi threw powder into Kip's eyes by mistake, Roxxi gets fired from VKM.
Judas Mesias vs Corey Chambers (a totally unknown jobber) in a total squash match.
Sharkboy issues an open challenge, no takers.
3 Way Knockouts Match - Roxxi Laveaux vs Angelina Love vs ODB. Not a great match for the girls, Love got the win.
Mixed Tag Match - Robert Roode & Peyton Banks & James Storm vs Sonjay Dutt & Traci Brooks (back to her original name again like I predicted) & Eric Young. A very weak match, Roode got the pin off Young for the win.
Kurt Angle vs Tomko with AJ Styles as guest ref. THIS was a main event? In what universe was this considered worthy to main event? A huge pile of garbage with Tomko taking the win off the worlds slowest 3 count after Christian Cage nailed Kurt with his belt.
Impact 7th Feb 08 - Robert Roode vs Jay Lethal - never started, Roode got jumped by Booker T before Roode ever made it to the ring.
Non-title Knockout Match - Traci Brooks vs Awesome Kong. Well this was going to be VERY short. Expected to be a squash match. Traci got a lot longer out of Kong than most of the women normally do. Kong took the expected win.
A 4 Corners Capture Misty Match - Kaz vs Black Reign. TNA management have officially gone crazy, they may as well have let Vince Russo take a s**t into the ring on live tv. This is a Rat on a Pole match. It's THAT F**KING STUPID! The 1st 2 boxes had traps in them both Kaz & Black Reign finding 1 each (and both totally overselling the "pain"), Black Reign found the 3rd trap, Kaz found Misty winning the match. Black Reign hit Kaz with his darkness falls weapon and reclaimed Misty.
X Division Title Match - Johnny Devine vs Homicide of LAX. Devine was alone but Homicide had the new valet Salinas. Homicide had this one in the bag until Team 3d interfered, match ending a DQ for outside interference.
Tag Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs Curry Man (AKA Chris Daniels) & Sharkboy (carrying on in his new SCSA persona which I don't much care for). As Curry Man, Daniels obviously doesn't mind jobbing but he's definitely getting over in the mask for sure. Sharkboy took the pin for his team.
Tiger Mask vs AJ Styles - Tiger Mask getting yet another chance to improve TNA/New Japan links. Styles was showing some of his old magic, Tiger Mask showed some great aerial moves (loved that standing moonsault!). Styles took a good win looking better than he has in a while.
Main Event, Christian Cage vs Judas Mesias - How is Mesias worthy of a main event? This was never going to be much to write home about really, was it? Cage is a good enough worker but not even he could carry this match as long as they ran it. Mesias simply hasn't got the skillset to work a match of this length, he's strictly a short match person. Cage took the win, Abyss had chased James Mitchell backstage with his arm wrapped in barbed wire and then came back after the pin to beatdown Mesias with the barbed wire. Styles came down to beatdown Cage as well, Angle had to rescue Styles from a sharpshooter & Tomko had to save Cage from a double team.
Against All Odds PPV 2008 - Tag Title Match - BG James & Bullet Bob Armstrong vs AJ Styles & Tomko. A title match to start off a PPV? Aren't these usually saved until the end of the card? On the face of it the champs looked like they would win but Styles & Tomko have been having problems recently. For 67, Bob works damn well! He's a darn sight more talented than Pacman Jones ever was, thats for certain. He took good bumps off both Tomko & Styles. Both guys sold convincingly for him as well. BG looked a lot better than he has done for a while but Tomko got the win after Styles hit BG in the knee hard. Loved the "Old Age Outlaws" sign in the crowd too.
TNA Knockout Grudge Match - Peyton Banks vs Traci Brooks. This was only going to be a scrap as Banks has never shown any actual wrestling ability yet. Banks has let her hair dye fade (she now has brown hair, having gone from blonde to black like Traci again pretty much like I predicted). Banks did show a few moves but not many. Traci got the better of this, looked better, had a wider arsenal of moves & looked the better trained of the 2 women. Brooks got the eventual win.
Case vs Case Match - Petey Williams vs Scott Steiner, the winner getting both a heavyweight title shot & an X-Division title shot. If we're honest they are STILL dragging out the Feast Or Fired angle here. And that was s**t. At best I was hoping for a really short match with a quick pin. These guys have totally opposing styles and really DON'T belong in a match together. An overly long match, Steiner got the win thanks to a hot black chick distracting Williams.
Drinking Championship Belt Match - James Storm vs Eric Young. Eric Young as a moronic imbecile is WAY old now, can they please kill the "scared of my own pyro" thing? Here's a match that doesn't belong on TV, let alone a PPV. Rhyno gored Storm behind the refs back, Eric Young took the win and retains his belt. Rhyno is back!
TNA Knockout Womens Title Match - Awesome Kong vs ODB. Why was this so low in the card? It certainly should have been higher than the non-title barbed wire match. I so wanted ODB to win this match, she's an ideal person to be Womens Champion. ODB might not have the same height or weight as Kong but she has a huge amount of spirit & fight and I didn't expect her to take a beating timidly from Kong. Is it just me or when ODB screams does she remind anyone else of Bobcat Goldthwait? If Chyna were to consider a comeback she'd have good people to work with in TNA like ODB and Kong. ODB's slam off the top turnbuckle was pretty awesome but Kong got the win thanks to a distraction by Raisha Saeed. ODB had a great match though.
Barbed Wire Massacre 2 - Abyss vs Judas Mesias. Basically a no rope barbed wire match. So serious the main stadium wouldn't let them hold it there, they claimed. So we cross over to The Impact Zone. (This one was SO obviously taped after the last Impact show, the exact same crowd was there. Mitchell had even changed his suit to try & convince us it wasn't the same day). I honestly didn't expect to see Mesias go on the wire very much with his ring clothes. We saw the use of a barbed wire chair, & several barbed wire boards. Hebner was VERY badly out of position after Abyss's 2 Black Hole Slams on Mitchell & Mesias. Abyss got a well deserved win after a Black Hole Slam into a barbed wire board on the canvas.
1 Fall Grudge Match - Robert Roode vs Booker T. Peyton appeared to have recovered from her match with Traci. I didn't expect to see anything fancy from Booker here, just aggression. Booker is in yet another PPV pretty high up the card as well. This match was way too long, getting into silly territory when Roode went backstage. The result was a double count-out (after a match THIS long? Are you S***TING ME?) but Booker took it back to his car.
6 Man Hardcore Street Fight for the X-Division Championship - Team 3d & Johnny Devine vs Jay Lethal & The Motor City Machine Guns. Stipulations are if 3d win, the X-Division disbands. If Lethal & Co win TNA will create a weight limit of 275 lbs for all workers. Obviously this result was a forgone conclusion before the match ever started. TNA were hardly going disband the X-Division who not only fill more than half the TNA roster, they are also one of TNA's biggest selling points so this was always going to be a win for Lethal & Co. The ref was very badly out of position to make a count after the triple Tornado DDT. Lethal & The Guns were ahead until then. For those wondering, SoCal Val is more than able to take bumps, she's been working a few Indy feds for a while (Oh, and FYI her real middle name is actually Elizabeth!). I'm not sure if they were using this to set-up up her eventual TNA in-ring debut to wrestle or for her to become his valet. Lethal took the win off Devine with a flying elbow through a table winning for his team, saving the X-Division & winning the X-Division Title again finally taking it back from Team 3d.
Heavyweight Championship Title - Kurt Angle vs Christian Cage with Samoa Joe as special guest enforcer. Alarm bells should have been ringing, hearing the words Special Guest Enforcer as historically they normally always screw someone out of a title. I assume Joe's role was to stop Styles or Tomko interfering? This match was way too long and way too boring for not only the main event but the Heavyweight title. Joe's main contribution seemed to be stopping Angle using a chair, filling in for the ref when he went down & stopping Styles. Tomko did a backbreaker on Cage while Joe was removing Styles and Angle took the win after reviving the ref once Tomko had gone.
Thursday, December 6, 2007
My TNA Monthly Catch-up, Dec 07 - Jan 08
Yep, once again it's that time of the month where I bring you up to date with all the action from the previous months Impacts and PPV. I know this catch-up is very late, I haven't been well - But I won't bore you with my personal problems. The usual caveats apply, I call it how I see it. The only bias is my own, If you don't like my opinion or how I say it then edon't read it. I do and will use colourful language, If I feel the need to swear then I will. Real people generally do. I only talk about what I feel is relevant to the advancement of TNA so you won't find me mentioning certain storylines or angles if they bore me. Now it's on to the catch-up!
Impact 6th December - Due to certain issues I didn't have this edition of Impact to review. Feel free to make up your own review. Maybe Kurt Angle admitted he was gay? Kevin Nash actually did something entertaining? Miss Brooks covered up her breasts? Jay Lethal didn't look like an utter c**t with a s**t gimmick for a change? I did a bit of searching and thanks to Rapidshare I actually managed to find this show to review so here goes with a real review (but I still bet my made-up one was a miles better show!).
Tag Match - Rellik & Black Reign vs LAX. What an odd match-up. LAX aren't hardcore workers but here they are working with 2 of hardest in TNA. Not that anything hardcore happened in this match, it was a pretty dull affair with Homicide getting the pin off Rellik with a roll-up.
Non-title Knockout Womens Match - ODB vs Gail Kim. I really do like ODB, not only can she wrestle, she's a great character! She's off her fricking head but she's got bags of character. The whole "slightly drunk" thing is a bit iffy if you ask me but it certainly seems to work for her. This was a decent enough match but it really didn't need the crappy cheat finish with ODB using the hipflask to hit Kim & get the pin.
Winner Takes Possession of Case #3 (from Feast or Fired) - Chris Daniels vs Senshi with Elix Skipper as special guest referee. Not a great match considering the abilities of the 2 men involved. Daniels got the pin and won the case.
Robert Roode joins Kurt Angle's Alliance.
6 Man Tag Team Ladder Match for possession of the X Division title belt - Team 3d & Johnny Devine vs Jay Lethal & The Motor City Machine Guns. This whole c***py storyline about Team 3d having Jay Lethal's belt is utter S**T! This is an issue that could be solved in seconds. Give Lethal one of the replica belts that TNA sells. Claim the belt Team 3d have isn't the real one.
Matter solved, none of these c***py storyline matches needed. With the amount of "things on a pole" or "things up a ladder" matches increasing like crazy at the moment it shows how truly involved Russo is with the show. Far too involved. With Team 3d still running as heels they are certainly doing a really good job of putting both Jay Lethal & The Motor City Machine Guns over. I was a bit annoyed about the very bad camera angle showing exactly where Chris Sabin's springboard clothesline actually hit Devon (on his arm) as he took him off the ladder. Either a badly positioned cameraman who should know better or an idiot director. Lethal actually undid the belt but Brother Ray hit him with a kendo stick when the ref was distracted and gave the belt to Johnny Devine who was given the win for his team.
10 Man Tag Match - Robert Roode, Christian Cage, AJ Styles & Tomko & Kurt Angle vs Kaz, Eric Young (neither of whom really deserve to be in a match like this if we're honest), Booker T, Kevin Nash & Samoa Joe. Nash got the win for his team in this overly long pretty mediocre match. Kaz & AJ Styles were the best workers in this by a country mile. This show also demonstrated exactly how long a "2 Hour Impact Show" actually is. 1 hour and 25 minutes long.
Wow, you Americans either have too many commercials or a really f**king short attention span?
Impact 13th Dec 07 - The show kicks off with Christian Cage coming out to bore us on the mic. Kurt Angle does likewise.
4 Way Feast, Fired Or $50,000 match - Chris Daniels vs BG James vs Petey Williams vs Scott Steiner. This is a carry on from the last PPV where 3 men win a title shot and 1 gets fired. As extra incentive they offer a 50 grand prize or swap your case for someone else's. Overall this was a decent enough match, Williams showing his stuff as usual. Steiner took the win & traded cases with Petey Williams. Petey's traded case held the World Heavyweight Title shot.
Rellik vs Kaz - not one of Kaz's best matches, Rellik had a decent enough match showing he actually can wrestle. All the s**te with Black Reign afterwards was pretty pointless though.
TNA Knockout Tag Team match - Velvet Sky & Angelina Love vs Ms Brooks & Jackie Moore. Playing on the angle that Jackie was drunk, this was going to be very 1 sided. Sky took some pretty nice bumps, Brooks is getting better with each match taking some pretty good bumps herself. Angelina Love took the eventual win which they worked well for. It also looks like their setting up a Booker T vs Robert Roode match.
James Mitchell comes out to bore us on the mic with some Abyss storyline s**te which was an obvious set-up for Judas Mesias to jump him when the lights went out.
Chris Harris vs Booker T - well this was a foregone conclusion before the bell rang with Booker getting the obvious win.
Back to the Feast Or Fired angle and inside BG James's case was a Tag Team Title shot.
Lumberjack Strap match - Johnny Devine vs Jay Lethal (still using the worst gimmick in TNA). Lethal getting the win from a nice elbow drop.
Back to Feast Or Fired again and the contents of the last 2 cases Scott Steiner got the X Division Title shot and Chris Daniels got fired. Like anyone believes that for even a femto second? Expect to see him back in some capacity very soon.
Handicap match, initially booked as a tag match but because Christian Cage couldn't find a partner he faced Kurt Angle & Robert Roode alone. Cage got the best of this match even on his own but Roode took the eventual win for his team.
Impact 20th Dec 07 - The show starts with Eric Young's Christmas at home. (Was that WWF Legend Bushwhacker Luke as "Uncle Leo"?).
Matt Morgan comes down to bore us on the mic.
8 Man Tag Team Christmas Chaos Cage Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave & James Storm & Robert Roode vs LAX's Homicide & Hernandez & Scott Steiner & Booker T. LAX got the best of this match but it was pretty obvious being the new guy that Booker T was going to take the win with a pin on Jimmy Rave. Booker hasn't lost a match yet.
Double North Pole Match - Chris Sabin, Alex Shelley & Jay Lethal vs Team 3d & Johnny Devine. Basically it's a "something on a pole" match so Russo had been hard at work doing f**k all as usual. They can either win an Ultimate X Match or a Plate Glass Table Match. After some help from some midgets Alex Shelley pulled down the Ultimate X Match for the win.
Santa's Workshop Knockout Streetfight Match - ODB vs Roxxi Laveaux vs Jackie Moore vs Christy Hemme vs Miss Brooks vs Awesome Kong vs Angelina Love vs Velvet Sky vs Gail Kim. Basically its a 9 woman hardcore weapons match with a festive twist. Kim & Kong were out of the ring & gone within seconds of the opening bell. ODB gave yet another good show of herself. Kong made her way back and took out everyone in the ring getting the win off Christy Hemme with the Awesome bomb. Kim finally made it back after the bell to level Kong with a chair but security had to break it up.
Silent Night, Bloody Night 4 Way Match - Rellik vs Shark Boy vs Black Reign vs Abyss. A match where Shark boy performed a lot better than expected to be honest but it was always going to a case of James Mitchell distracting Abyss for Judas Mesias to jump him. Rellik got the eventual win off Shark boy.
Grab The Reindeer Ladder Match - AJ Styles vs Kaz, basically whoever gets the reindeer costume 1st, the loser has to wear the costume. With Kaz getting a big push recently and AJ jobbing to everyone left, right and centre I predicted a win for Kaz. Styles pulls some wicked moves showing his classic style. Kaz got the predicted win and AJ had to wear the Reindeer suit.
Impact 27th Dec 07 - Senshi vs Judas Mesias. Well this was always going to be a squash match wasn't it? How have WWE not sued TNA for Mesias totally stealing & ripping off Gangrel's gimmick? I didn't expect this to be long and it wasn't. Mesias getting the predicted win.
Christian Cage comes down to bore us on the mic.
Robert Roode vs Booker T - yet another match between these 2 which was most likely going Bookers way yet again. This one never got started with Kurt Angle jumping Booker and Booker getting a beatdown off them both. Booker decides to make it a tag match later in the evening. Who died and made him Jim Cornette?
Non-title Tag Match - Tomko & AJ Styles vs Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley. As a non-title match I predicted The Motor City Machine Guns to win. Which went exactly the way I called it, Shelley & Sabin taking a very deserved win.
Tag Team Knockout match - Roxxi Laveaux & Jackie Moore & ODB & Angelina Love & Velvet Sky & Gail Kim. The women are now getting more and better matches to showcase their talent Even though this was a light team versus a heavy team both teams had different skill sets but were still equally matched. Love & Sky are really establishing themselves as quite a tagteam now, ODB improves every time I see her. Roxxi I still haven't seen enough of and needs to make more of the chances they are giving her. Roxxi did make a nice sit-out powerbomb on Kim but Kim got the eventual win for her team.
Elix Skipper vs Samoa Joe - After being told to fight or be fired Joe came out but he sure wasn't dressed to fight but he did. The ref DQ'd Joe after throwing him around so Skipper got the win on paper.
Tag Match - Robert Roode & Kurt Angle vs Booker T and his mystery partner who turned out to be Christian Cage which wasn't very surprising. Another thing that wasn't surprising was Bookers team winning with Cage taking the win off Roode with the unprettier.
Impact 3rd Jan 08 - Tag Team division Gauntlet match - A Basic Battle Royale but with tag teams. Lance Hoyt & Kip James start things off. Next in is Brother Devon. Next in is Alex Shelley. Next in is Homicide who eliminates Kip James. Next in is Jimmy Rave. Next in is BG James who eliminates Devon. Next in is Brother Ray. Next in is Chris Sabin who eliminates BG James. Last in is Hernandez. Brother Ray eliminates Alex Shelley. Chris Sabin eliminates Brother Ray. During the commercial break (I keep saying they have them at F**KING AWFUL times and am only proved even more right by this one!) Lance Hoyt eliminates Hernandez and Jimmy Rave eliminates Homicide. Then we switch to a classic match and Alex Shelley gets the win off Jimmy Rave.
Womens Knockout Gauntlet Match - Exactly like the last match except its the women and its just a singles match. Angelina Love & Miss Brooks start things off. Next in is Jackie Moore. Next in is Velvet Sky. Next in is Christy Hemme. Next in is ODB who eliminates Miss Brooks. Next in is Roxxi Laveaux. Last in is Awesome Kong who eliminates Christy Hemme, Velvet Sky & Angelina Love. Working together Roxxi, ODB & Jackie eliminate Awesome Kong. Roxxi Laveaux eliminates Jackie Moore and its her vs ODB to a pinfall. ODB went for a quick pin but Roxxi turned things around. Both women made some nice moves but ODB won using sheer weight to get the pin.
X Division Gauntlet Match - Just like the previous match except with the X Division guys, Sonjay Dutt & Petey Williams kick things off. Next in is Shark boy. Next in is Elix Skipper who eliminates himself jumping at Sonjay Dutt, silly t**t. Next in is Johnny Devine who eliminates Shark boy. Last in is Senshi. Johnny Devine & Sonjay Dutt eliminate Johnny Devine together. Senshi eliminates Sonjay Dutt leaving Petey Williams vs Senshi for the pinfall. Williams takes the win off the Canadian Destroyer.
Heavyweight Gauntlet - Again, exactly the same as before, this time the Heavyweight men. Booker T & James Storm start things off. Next in is Robert Roode. Here Booker had a whole minute of 2 on 1 to cope with depending on who the next man in was really. Next in was Eric Young. As a heavyweight? X Division perhaps but never has EY been a Heavyweight contender. Another break taken at a bad time during which Black Reign, Rellik, Kaz & Chris Harris entered the match (So the break was at least 5 minutes long. During a match like this? What drugs are you on TNA schedulers?). Next in as Kaz was eliminating James Storm was Scott Steiner who eliminated Robert Roode. Next in was Judas Mesias as Steiner eliminated Chris Harris, Judas Mesias eliminated Kaz. Next in is Kevin Nash. Next in is Abyss, Judas Mesias eliminates Scott Steiner & Eric Young. Abyss eliminates Judas Mesias & himself. Next in is Samoa Joe. Last in is Christian Cage. Black Reign eliminates Booker T (making that Bookers 1st match he hasn't won or been on the winning team). Samoa Joe eliminates Rellik as the camera's are watching totally the wrong action by focusing on Cage and Angle (who isn't even involved in this match) on the entry ramp. Kevin Nash eliminates Black Reign then eliminates himself leaving Cage vs Joe to the pinfall that Cage steals from a very sneaky & fast roll up.
Final Resolution PPV Jan 6th 08 - Tag Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs LAX. Not a match that really belonged on a PPV, this really should have been settled on tv. LAX get the win and the "man" (who was obviously a woman) who's been slap jacking Christie Hemme is finally revealed to be a female. It looks like the womens division just gained another body. Let's hope she can work as well as she looks.
Black Reign vs Kaz. Yet another match that didn't belong on a PPV. Kaz could have worked a much better match than this. Kaz isn't a hardcore wrestler. He wasn't hardcore as part of Seratonin and he still isn't as a singles worker. Kaz won a pretty easy and scrappy match.
TNA Knockout Womens No DQ Title Match - Awesome Kong vs Gail Kim. This match was always going to favour Kong and I wondered if Kim was going to use outside interference from some of the other women to win it. It went straight out of the ring and on the whole was the squash match it looked like it was going to be. Really this should have been stopped as soon as Kong powerbombed the ref. I know it was no DQ but that should only apply wrestler to wrestler. Kim gets the unlikely win using 2nd ref Rudy Charles to get a roll-over.
Judas Mesias vs Abyss - This Abyss storyline just isn't interesting enough to merit a PPV match. Mesias might look good but he doesn't seem to have the moves or skillset to belong in a PPV match. Mesias isn't any good unless he's jumping someone from behind or with several other people helping him. Abyss on the other hand has had good PPV matches with many people, he was carrying Mesias for most of this match whilst Mitchell was backstage. Mesias took the win after interference by Mitchell. The very cheap c**p attempt to make us believe Mitchell was going to set Abyss on fire? I think not, especially not after that PPV TNA had where the building was partially set alight by a misfiring pyro. Check your PPV history next time before you try to pull a piece of b**ls**t like that on us James Mitchell. W**ker!
Mixed Tag Match - Robert Roode & Miss Brooks vs Booker T & Sharmell. It was nice for them to finally find a way to use Sharmell in a wrestling capacity as I'd been hoping to see her work in-ring since her and Booker arrived. Roodes ability to sell certain moves in this match was truly awful. He looked like a rank amateur in places. Roode didn't seem to want to be hit by Booker's knee lifts to the chest and didn't seem to know how to sell them either. Booker was more than happy to show Roode how to sell a knee lift to the chest though. Sharmell finally got a chance in-ring but there was no real skill from her or any wrestling moves done. Sharmell got the pin after Miss Brooks was bumped back to the mat after hitting Roode. It looks like hopefully and finally Miss Brooks & Robert Roode are done after he knocked out Sharmell. It's time to hook him up with the crazy superfan, their perfect for each other.
6 man Tag Team Ultimate X Match for possession of the X Division belt - In yet another bit of bad organisation the ring wasn't already set up for this match which I found very surprising. Team 3d & Johnny Devine vs The Motor City Machine Guns & Jay Lethal. 3d get the win after using a ladder to get to the belt while the ref was "knocked out".
Tag Team Championship Match - AJ Styles & Tomko vs Samoa Joe & Kevin Nash. Joe was filling in for Scott Hall who by now must have burnt all his bridges with TNA. Joe got to a point where he was in trouble & Nash stepped off the apron leaving Joe alone to fight the tag champions in what was now a handicap match. The ref was allowing a truly blatant double team for far too long not even attempting to make the illegal man leave the ring at any point & Joe had no chance with Tomko getting the pin to retain the belts for his team.
Heavyweight Title Match - Kurt Angle vs Christian Cage. Basically this matches outcome solely depended on where AJ Styles decided his true friends were as his allies. Cage really didn't deserve this title shot (I can't even remember how he got it to be honest) and neither of these guys is entertaining enough to carry this match. Cage has been a heel too long to suddenly be a face and Angle has pretty much been a heel since he started in TNA. The match was far too long and drawn out with too much mat based wrestling. Leaving AJ out to finally come out in the last 30 seconds of the match to turn on Cage and earn Angle the win was not a good idea. As the main event this was very weak indeed and the womens matches made this look very bad.
My predictions for this year:-
Kaz will win a belt, X Division or Heavyweight but that would be a very short run.
Jeff Jarrett will finally return & we will see more of the women having tag matches leading hopefully to a possible tag belt for them.
Sting may finally retire as hopefully will Kevin Nash.
Robert Roodes superfan will either dye her hair black or wear a black wig and ambush Miss Brooks outside the Impact Zone taking her place, Roode won't notice until she helps him to a win and she reveals who she really is and he hires her and fires Miss Brooks finally leaving her free to work in the Womens division under a new image and go back to being Tracey Brooks.
Booker T will win the Heavyweight title or possibly the Tag title with Scott Steiner.
Impact 6th December - Due to certain issues I didn't have this edition of Impact to review. Feel free to make up your own review. Maybe Kurt Angle admitted he was gay? Kevin Nash actually did something entertaining? Miss Brooks covered up her breasts? Jay Lethal didn't look like an utter c**t with a s**t gimmick for a change? I did a bit of searching and thanks to Rapidshare I actually managed to find this show to review so here goes with a real review (but I still bet my made-up one was a miles better show!).
Tag Match - Rellik & Black Reign vs LAX. What an odd match-up. LAX aren't hardcore workers but here they are working with 2 of hardest in TNA. Not that anything hardcore happened in this match, it was a pretty dull affair with Homicide getting the pin off Rellik with a roll-up.
Non-title Knockout Womens Match - ODB vs Gail Kim. I really do like ODB, not only can she wrestle, she's a great character! She's off her fricking head but she's got bags of character. The whole "slightly drunk" thing is a bit iffy if you ask me but it certainly seems to work for her. This was a decent enough match but it really didn't need the crappy cheat finish with ODB using the hipflask to hit Kim & get the pin.
Winner Takes Possession of Case #3 (from Feast or Fired) - Chris Daniels vs Senshi with Elix Skipper as special guest referee. Not a great match considering the abilities of the 2 men involved. Daniels got the pin and won the case.
Robert Roode joins Kurt Angle's Alliance.
6 Man Tag Team Ladder Match for possession of the X Division title belt - Team 3d & Johnny Devine vs Jay Lethal & The Motor City Machine Guns. This whole c***py storyline about Team 3d having Jay Lethal's belt is utter S**T! This is an issue that could be solved in seconds. Give Lethal one of the replica belts that TNA sells. Claim the belt Team 3d have isn't the real one.
Matter solved, none of these c***py storyline matches needed. With the amount of "things on a pole" or "things up a ladder" matches increasing like crazy at the moment it shows how truly involved Russo is with the show. Far too involved. With Team 3d still running as heels they are certainly doing a really good job of putting both Jay Lethal & The Motor City Machine Guns over. I was a bit annoyed about the very bad camera angle showing exactly where Chris Sabin's springboard clothesline actually hit Devon (on his arm) as he took him off the ladder. Either a badly positioned cameraman who should know better or an idiot director. Lethal actually undid the belt but Brother Ray hit him with a kendo stick when the ref was distracted and gave the belt to Johnny Devine who was given the win for his team.
10 Man Tag Match - Robert Roode, Christian Cage, AJ Styles & Tomko & Kurt Angle vs Kaz, Eric Young (neither of whom really deserve to be in a match like this if we're honest), Booker T, Kevin Nash & Samoa Joe. Nash got the win for his team in this overly long pretty mediocre match. Kaz & AJ Styles were the best workers in this by a country mile. This show also demonstrated exactly how long a "2 Hour Impact Show" actually is. 1 hour and 25 minutes long.
Wow, you Americans either have too many commercials or a really f**king short attention span?
Impact 13th Dec 07 - The show kicks off with Christian Cage coming out to bore us on the mic. Kurt Angle does likewise.
4 Way Feast, Fired Or $50,000 match - Chris Daniels vs BG James vs Petey Williams vs Scott Steiner. This is a carry on from the last PPV where 3 men win a title shot and 1 gets fired. As extra incentive they offer a 50 grand prize or swap your case for someone else's. Overall this was a decent enough match, Williams showing his stuff as usual. Steiner took the win & traded cases with Petey Williams. Petey's traded case held the World Heavyweight Title shot.
Rellik vs Kaz - not one of Kaz's best matches, Rellik had a decent enough match showing he actually can wrestle. All the s**te with Black Reign afterwards was pretty pointless though.
TNA Knockout Tag Team match - Velvet Sky & Angelina Love vs Ms Brooks & Jackie Moore. Playing on the angle that Jackie was drunk, this was going to be very 1 sided. Sky took some pretty nice bumps, Brooks is getting better with each match taking some pretty good bumps herself. Angelina Love took the eventual win which they worked well for. It also looks like their setting up a Booker T vs Robert Roode match.
James Mitchell comes out to bore us on the mic with some Abyss storyline s**te which was an obvious set-up for Judas Mesias to jump him when the lights went out.
Chris Harris vs Booker T - well this was a foregone conclusion before the bell rang with Booker getting the obvious win.
Back to the Feast Or Fired angle and inside BG James's case was a Tag Team Title shot.
Lumberjack Strap match - Johnny Devine vs Jay Lethal (still using the worst gimmick in TNA). Lethal getting the win from a nice elbow drop.
Back to Feast Or Fired again and the contents of the last 2 cases Scott Steiner got the X Division Title shot and Chris Daniels got fired. Like anyone believes that for even a femto second? Expect to see him back in some capacity very soon.
Handicap match, initially booked as a tag match but because Christian Cage couldn't find a partner he faced Kurt Angle & Robert Roode alone. Cage got the best of this match even on his own but Roode took the eventual win for his team.
Impact 20th Dec 07 - The show starts with Eric Young's Christmas at home. (Was that WWF Legend Bushwhacker Luke as "Uncle Leo"?).
Matt Morgan comes down to bore us on the mic.
8 Man Tag Team Christmas Chaos Cage Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave & James Storm & Robert Roode vs LAX's Homicide & Hernandez & Scott Steiner & Booker T. LAX got the best of this match but it was pretty obvious being the new guy that Booker T was going to take the win with a pin on Jimmy Rave. Booker hasn't lost a match yet.
Double North Pole Match - Chris Sabin, Alex Shelley & Jay Lethal vs Team 3d & Johnny Devine. Basically it's a "something on a pole" match so Russo had been hard at work doing f**k all as usual. They can either win an Ultimate X Match or a Plate Glass Table Match. After some help from some midgets Alex Shelley pulled down the Ultimate X Match for the win.
Santa's Workshop Knockout Streetfight Match - ODB vs Roxxi Laveaux vs Jackie Moore vs Christy Hemme vs Miss Brooks vs Awesome Kong vs Angelina Love vs Velvet Sky vs Gail Kim. Basically its a 9 woman hardcore weapons match with a festive twist. Kim & Kong were out of the ring & gone within seconds of the opening bell. ODB gave yet another good show of herself. Kong made her way back and took out everyone in the ring getting the win off Christy Hemme with the Awesome bomb. Kim finally made it back after the bell to level Kong with a chair but security had to break it up.
Silent Night, Bloody Night 4 Way Match - Rellik vs Shark Boy vs Black Reign vs Abyss. A match where Shark boy performed a lot better than expected to be honest but it was always going to a case of James Mitchell distracting Abyss for Judas Mesias to jump him. Rellik got the eventual win off Shark boy.
Grab The Reindeer Ladder Match - AJ Styles vs Kaz, basically whoever gets the reindeer costume 1st, the loser has to wear the costume. With Kaz getting a big push recently and AJ jobbing to everyone left, right and centre I predicted a win for Kaz. Styles pulls some wicked moves showing his classic style. Kaz got the predicted win and AJ had to wear the Reindeer suit.
Impact 27th Dec 07 - Senshi vs Judas Mesias. Well this was always going to be a squash match wasn't it? How have WWE not sued TNA for Mesias totally stealing & ripping off Gangrel's gimmick? I didn't expect this to be long and it wasn't. Mesias getting the predicted win.
Christian Cage comes down to bore us on the mic.
Robert Roode vs Booker T - yet another match between these 2 which was most likely going Bookers way yet again. This one never got started with Kurt Angle jumping Booker and Booker getting a beatdown off them both. Booker decides to make it a tag match later in the evening. Who died and made him Jim Cornette?
Non-title Tag Match - Tomko & AJ Styles vs Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley. As a non-title match I predicted The Motor City Machine Guns to win. Which went exactly the way I called it, Shelley & Sabin taking a very deserved win.
Tag Team Knockout match - Roxxi Laveaux & Jackie Moore & ODB & Angelina Love & Velvet Sky & Gail Kim. The women are now getting more and better matches to showcase their talent Even though this was a light team versus a heavy team both teams had different skill sets but were still equally matched. Love & Sky are really establishing themselves as quite a tagteam now, ODB improves every time I see her. Roxxi I still haven't seen enough of and needs to make more of the chances they are giving her. Roxxi did make a nice sit-out powerbomb on Kim but Kim got the eventual win for her team.
Elix Skipper vs Samoa Joe - After being told to fight or be fired Joe came out but he sure wasn't dressed to fight but he did. The ref DQ'd Joe after throwing him around so Skipper got the win on paper.
Tag Match - Robert Roode & Kurt Angle vs Booker T and his mystery partner who turned out to be Christian Cage which wasn't very surprising. Another thing that wasn't surprising was Bookers team winning with Cage taking the win off Roode with the unprettier.
Impact 3rd Jan 08 - Tag Team division Gauntlet match - A Basic Battle Royale but with tag teams. Lance Hoyt & Kip James start things off. Next in is Brother Devon. Next in is Alex Shelley. Next in is Homicide who eliminates Kip James. Next in is Jimmy Rave. Next in is BG James who eliminates Devon. Next in is Brother Ray. Next in is Chris Sabin who eliminates BG James. Last in is Hernandez. Brother Ray eliminates Alex Shelley. Chris Sabin eliminates Brother Ray. During the commercial break (I keep saying they have them at F**KING AWFUL times and am only proved even more right by this one!) Lance Hoyt eliminates Hernandez and Jimmy Rave eliminates Homicide. Then we switch to a classic match and Alex Shelley gets the win off Jimmy Rave.
Womens Knockout Gauntlet Match - Exactly like the last match except its the women and its just a singles match. Angelina Love & Miss Brooks start things off. Next in is Jackie Moore. Next in is Velvet Sky. Next in is Christy Hemme. Next in is ODB who eliminates Miss Brooks. Next in is Roxxi Laveaux. Last in is Awesome Kong who eliminates Christy Hemme, Velvet Sky & Angelina Love. Working together Roxxi, ODB & Jackie eliminate Awesome Kong. Roxxi Laveaux eliminates Jackie Moore and its her vs ODB to a pinfall. ODB went for a quick pin but Roxxi turned things around. Both women made some nice moves but ODB won using sheer weight to get the pin.
X Division Gauntlet Match - Just like the previous match except with the X Division guys, Sonjay Dutt & Petey Williams kick things off. Next in is Shark boy. Next in is Elix Skipper who eliminates himself jumping at Sonjay Dutt, silly t**t. Next in is Johnny Devine who eliminates Shark boy. Last in is Senshi. Johnny Devine & Sonjay Dutt eliminate Johnny Devine together. Senshi eliminates Sonjay Dutt leaving Petey Williams vs Senshi for the pinfall. Williams takes the win off the Canadian Destroyer.
Heavyweight Gauntlet - Again, exactly the same as before, this time the Heavyweight men. Booker T & James Storm start things off. Next in is Robert Roode. Here Booker had a whole minute of 2 on 1 to cope with depending on who the next man in was really. Next in was Eric Young. As a heavyweight? X Division perhaps but never has EY been a Heavyweight contender. Another break taken at a bad time during which Black Reign, Rellik, Kaz & Chris Harris entered the match (So the break was at least 5 minutes long. During a match like this? What drugs are you on TNA schedulers?). Next in as Kaz was eliminating James Storm was Scott Steiner who eliminated Robert Roode. Next in was Judas Mesias as Steiner eliminated Chris Harris, Judas Mesias eliminated Kaz. Next in is Kevin Nash. Next in is Abyss, Judas Mesias eliminates Scott Steiner & Eric Young. Abyss eliminates Judas Mesias & himself. Next in is Samoa Joe. Last in is Christian Cage. Black Reign eliminates Booker T (making that Bookers 1st match he hasn't won or been on the winning team). Samoa Joe eliminates Rellik as the camera's are watching totally the wrong action by focusing on Cage and Angle (who isn't even involved in this match) on the entry ramp. Kevin Nash eliminates Black Reign then eliminates himself leaving Cage vs Joe to the pinfall that Cage steals from a very sneaky & fast roll up.
Final Resolution PPV Jan 6th 08 - Tag Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs LAX. Not a match that really belonged on a PPV, this really should have been settled on tv. LAX get the win and the "man" (who was obviously a woman) who's been slap jacking Christie Hemme is finally revealed to be a female. It looks like the womens division just gained another body. Let's hope she can work as well as she looks.
Black Reign vs Kaz. Yet another match that didn't belong on a PPV. Kaz could have worked a much better match than this. Kaz isn't a hardcore wrestler. He wasn't hardcore as part of Seratonin and he still isn't as a singles worker. Kaz won a pretty easy and scrappy match.
TNA Knockout Womens No DQ Title Match - Awesome Kong vs Gail Kim. This match was always going to favour Kong and I wondered if Kim was going to use outside interference from some of the other women to win it. It went straight out of the ring and on the whole was the squash match it looked like it was going to be. Really this should have been stopped as soon as Kong powerbombed the ref. I know it was no DQ but that should only apply wrestler to wrestler. Kim gets the unlikely win using 2nd ref Rudy Charles to get a roll-over.
Judas Mesias vs Abyss - This Abyss storyline just isn't interesting enough to merit a PPV match. Mesias might look good but he doesn't seem to have the moves or skillset to belong in a PPV match. Mesias isn't any good unless he's jumping someone from behind or with several other people helping him. Abyss on the other hand has had good PPV matches with many people, he was carrying Mesias for most of this match whilst Mitchell was backstage. Mesias took the win after interference by Mitchell. The very cheap c**p attempt to make us believe Mitchell was going to set Abyss on fire? I think not, especially not after that PPV TNA had where the building was partially set alight by a misfiring pyro. Check your PPV history next time before you try to pull a piece of b**ls**t like that on us James Mitchell. W**ker!
Mixed Tag Match - Robert Roode & Miss Brooks vs Booker T & Sharmell. It was nice for them to finally find a way to use Sharmell in a wrestling capacity as I'd been hoping to see her work in-ring since her and Booker arrived. Roodes ability to sell certain moves in this match was truly awful. He looked like a rank amateur in places. Roode didn't seem to want to be hit by Booker's knee lifts to the chest and didn't seem to know how to sell them either. Booker was more than happy to show Roode how to sell a knee lift to the chest though. Sharmell finally got a chance in-ring but there was no real skill from her or any wrestling moves done. Sharmell got the pin after Miss Brooks was bumped back to the mat after hitting Roode. It looks like hopefully and finally Miss Brooks & Robert Roode are done after he knocked out Sharmell. It's time to hook him up with the crazy superfan, their perfect for each other.
6 man Tag Team Ultimate X Match for possession of the X Division belt - In yet another bit of bad organisation the ring wasn't already set up for this match which I found very surprising. Team 3d & Johnny Devine vs The Motor City Machine Guns & Jay Lethal. 3d get the win after using a ladder to get to the belt while the ref was "knocked out".
Tag Team Championship Match - AJ Styles & Tomko vs Samoa Joe & Kevin Nash. Joe was filling in for Scott Hall who by now must have burnt all his bridges with TNA. Joe got to a point where he was in trouble & Nash stepped off the apron leaving Joe alone to fight the tag champions in what was now a handicap match. The ref was allowing a truly blatant double team for far too long not even attempting to make the illegal man leave the ring at any point & Joe had no chance with Tomko getting the pin to retain the belts for his team.
Heavyweight Title Match - Kurt Angle vs Christian Cage. Basically this matches outcome solely depended on where AJ Styles decided his true friends were as his allies. Cage really didn't deserve this title shot (I can't even remember how he got it to be honest) and neither of these guys is entertaining enough to carry this match. Cage has been a heel too long to suddenly be a face and Angle has pretty much been a heel since he started in TNA. The match was far too long and drawn out with too much mat based wrestling. Leaving AJ out to finally come out in the last 30 seconds of the match to turn on Cage and earn Angle the win was not a good idea. As the main event this was very weak indeed and the womens matches made this look very bad.
My predictions for this year:-
Kaz will win a belt, X Division or Heavyweight but that would be a very short run.
Jeff Jarrett will finally return & we will see more of the women having tag matches leading hopefully to a possible tag belt for them.
Sting may finally retire as hopefully will Kevin Nash.
Robert Roodes superfan will either dye her hair black or wear a black wig and ambush Miss Brooks outside the Impact Zone taking her place, Roode won't notice until she helps him to a win and she reveals who she really is and he hires her and fires Miss Brooks finally leaving her free to work in the Womens division under a new image and go back to being Tracey Brooks.
Booker T will win the Heavyweight title or possibly the Tag title with Scott Steiner.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
My TNA Monthly Catch-up, Nov - Dec 07
Once again it's that time of month where I review the previous months Impacts & PPV.
I call it how I see it, I only talk about stuff I feel is relevant to the advancement of TNA as a brand and if its s**t I'll say so. I don't apologise for my use of bad or colourful language, I'm a real person - That's how we speak.
If you don't like my views then don't read them. If you do like my views or want to comment on anything I've said then feel free to feedback. I generally respond to people who feedback on my posts. Onto the review.
Impact 15th Nov 07 - Jim Cornett tells West & Tenay they can't mention 2 of the participants from the last PPV. I assumed he meant Booker T & Scott Hall.
Show opens with Kurt Angle coming out to bore us on the mic. Nash interupts him & they fight, Nash getting beaten down by Kurt's cronies. The X-Division make the save.
Tag Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs LAX. This was a pretty decent match. I still want to see Jimmy Rave with a better partner than Hoyt (someone like James Storm, Chris Harris or Petey Williams). Rave gets the win from the roll-up.
More from Team 3d in their heel turn which is getting old.
Mixed Tag Match - Robert Roode & Miss Brooks vs Gail Kim & Chris Harris. Roode took the win from a chair shot & hopefully Miss Brooks is now a solo wrestler.
A bit more b**ls**t storyline with Team 3d & it seems Havok is now no longer part of Seratonin (when was he part of the X-Divsion ever?).
Hall & Nash come out to the ring for a chat to us.
3 way match - Rellik vs Black Reign vs Abyss. This was more of a 2 on 1 with Rellik & Reign working together. Abyss got the win off Rellik with the Black Hole Slam. Unsurprisingly with Rhyno making the save this looked like a set-up for a future PPV tag match.
Womens match - Awesome Kong vs Alexa Jade. Another squash match where another girl jobs to Kong, this gets neither woman over. Kong won off the sit-out powerbomb. Why are they bothering with Kong, not even ODB is big enough to be an even matchup for her. The post match run in from Gail Kim definately put her over big time.
Cornette's 2 new signings are announced as Booker T & Sharmell. Booker looked very happy coming down to the ring.
TNA World Heavyweight Title - Kaz vs Kurt Angle. Kaz was never likely to win this as the odds of Angle dropping the belt at a house show are very low indeed. Kaz worked well as he pretty much always does & Angle put him over very well too. Angle took the predictable win.
Samoa Joe is revealed as Hall & Nash's partner.
Impact 22nd Nov 07 - TNA Turkey Bowl, 3 way Match which is basically a guy from the Heavyweight division, a guy from the Tag division and a guy from the X-Division all competing in a knockout match with the eventual winner getting $25,000 and the loser has to wear a turkey suit (Ala The Gobbledy Gooker, didn't TNA Spanish Announcer Hector Guerrero once wear that suit?).
1st Semi final - Brother Devon vs Abyss vs Chris Sabin. Devon jumped Sabin before Abyss ever made it to the ring Devon got the best of this match at the start but all 3 guys worked well & looked ok. Rellik & Black Reign distracted Abyss who was saved by Rhyno, leaving Sabin & Devon to finish the match. Sabin got a great win after a failed run-in from Brother Ray.
TNA Turkey Bowl 2nd Semi final - Johnny Devine (dropping the "Havok" name after his run with Team 3d last week) vs Kip James vs Samoa Joe. Joe sold well for Kip & Devine at the start & Joe took the win from the Muscle Buster off Devine.
TNA Turkey Bowl 3rd Semi final - AJ Styles vs Jay Lethal (still running TNA's worst gimmick ever) vs Christian Cage. Cage was a no-show by the bell so AJ & Lethal went 1 on 1. Both guys are good workers & made a decent match before Cage decided to join them. During another badly timed commercial break Styles was run out of the ring by Cage. Lethal worked Cage well enough but it was a pretty scrappy match by Cage. AJ Styles got a win that I actually predicted when I saw the previous winners as we already had an X Division guy & a Heavyweight guy so obviously the Tag guy was going to win.
3 way Womens match - Velvet Sky vs Angelina Love vs ODB. It's clear from this bit of booking that TNA management still don't trust the women or take them seriously enough. ODB's main role was to put the other 2 girls over & let them show their talents. Both Love & Sky worked really well & looked stunning too. I did hope this wasn't going to be a squash match but sadly it was with a predictable win for ODB but the other 2 girls gave a great match.
TNA Turkey Bowl final - Chris Sabin vs Samoa Joe vs AJ Styles. On the face of it this sounded like an AWESOME match but with the way their running AJ's character I predicted Sabin to win & AJ to get the Turkey suit. As a 3 way match I did wonder how they were going to decide who "lost" this, My assumption was whoever got pinned was "the loser". All 3 of these guys are excellent workers & made for a very good fast paced match. Samoa Joe got the win from AJ so I at least did pick the correct loser.
Impact 29th Nov 07 - Show opens with new signings Booker T & Sharmell coming down to bore us on the mic.
Mixed Tag Match - Eric Young & Gail Kim vs Christy Hemme & Jimmy Rave. Kim & Hemme did ok to showcase themselves, Young & Rave worked pretty well too. Kim got a good win for her team.
Some storyline c**p involving Young afterwards.
An Anything Goes Big Boy Street Fight Tag Match - Sonjay Dutt & Jay Lethal vs Team 3d. 3d got the eventual win after Johnny Devine interfered.
Rellik vs Rhyno. Sorry, but never did I ever believe for even a femto second this would stay a 1 on 1 match. Rhyno got the win & my prediction came true after the win was called with a run in by Black Reign & a save by Abyss.
Special Challenge Match, Robert Roode vs Booker T - as an Impact debut Booker couldn't really expect a big name to work with but this was always going to be Booker winning before the match even started. Roode had a decent enough match & also put Booker over very well. A predictable win to Booker off the "axe kick" formerly known as the Book-end.
8 Man Tag Match - Christian Cage, Aj Styles, Tomko & Kurt Angle vs Kaz, (have they been recycling Shane Douglas' old TNA wardobe for Kaz?), Scott Steiner, Abyss & Samoa Joe. Just about everyone got to hit their finisher in this match with Joe winning off the muscle buster.
Turning Point PPV 07 - 6 man Tag Team Tables Match. Team 3d & Johnny Devine vs Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley & Black Machismo. On the face of it this seemed to be a foregone conclusion of 3d winning as the heavier team with expertise in tables matches. The X Division guys were the more cohesive unit working better together as a team. After a c**p ref knockout (all referee knockouts are c**p by the way) 3d got the win.
TNA Knockout Womens Tag Match - Roxxi Laveaux & ODB vs Velvet Sky & Angelina Love. A very well worked match with Love & Sky getting the better of it & the eventual win.
James Storm vs Eric Young. This match did NOT belong in a PPV. An overly long dull match with Young getting the win.
Feast Or Fired - Basically a classic Russo inspired "something on a pole" match with 4 cases, 1 contains an X-Division title shot, 1 contains a Heavyweight title shot, 1 contains a Tag title shot & 1 says "Your Fired" so it's also got that "Loser leaves TNA" twist as well. Triple X vs Sonjay Dutt vs Sharkboy vs Petey Williams vs Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs Chris Harris vs VKM vs LAX vs Scott Steiner. Idle gossip had already told us that Senshi was leaving so we knew who was going to get the "Your Fired" case. West & Tenay told us the contents of these cases weren't going to be announced until the following weeks Impact so WHAT WAS THE F**KING POINT OF THIS MATCH? Petey Williams got case #4 (most likely an X-Division title shot), BG James took case#1 (almost certainly the Tag title shot), Senshi got case #3 (which must have been "Your Fired") and case #2 went to Scott Steiner (almost certainly the Heavyweight title shot).
TNA Knockout Womens Championship Match - Gail Kim vs Awesome Kong. Kong had a new ring outfit & wore something under it having learnt from her previous PPV clothing failure/breast flash. This was never going to be pretty & on the face of it seemed to be yet another in Kong's serious of squash matches. Kim retained the belt after Kong pushed the ref getting herself dq'd.
Tag Match of 10,000 thumbtacks. Black Reign & Rellik vs Abyss & Raven (replacing Rhyno who was out after Rellik injured his neck in a match we obviously never saw on tv). Raven seems to have slimmed down a bit more for this match. This was never going to pretty & we weren't going to see much actual wrestling, mainly brawling harkening back to the classic days of ECW. The annoying & extremely loud woman screaming ABYSS! made this match hard to bear. Raven put Black Reign into a table of thumbtacks from the top turnbuckle (effectively ending his match) & fell through another table very hard himself leaving Rellik & Abyss to duke it out. Abyss got the win for his team after putting Rellik into thumbtacks in the ring with The Black Hole Slam.
Tag Match - Robert Roode & Christian Cage vs Booker T & Kaz. Booker getting his 2nd ppv appearance since coming to TNA. Kaz made the best of this match as well, working well as he usually does. Roode had one of his better matches & even Cage gave a decent account of himself in the ring for a change. Booker got the win for his team after Roode mistakenly hit Cage with the chair.
Samoa Joe shoots on Scott Hall's no-show.
Joe also shoots big time before the match starts, especially against Hall & Nash.
6 Man Tag Team Grudge Match - AJ Styles, Tomko & Kurt Angle vs Kevin Nash, Samoa Joe & Eric Young replacing that unreliable drunken f**k Scott Hall. I think when Joe said "fire me, I don't care" he genuinely meant it!. All the work from Joe was going to be his hardest, likewise all the work from Eric Young. This was a new side to Eric Young with him doing moves I've never seen him attempt before. Joe, Nash & Young made the 2nd half of this match with Joe getting the win with the Muscle Buster off Tomko of all people.
I call it how I see it, I only talk about stuff I feel is relevant to the advancement of TNA as a brand and if its s**t I'll say so. I don't apologise for my use of bad or colourful language, I'm a real person - That's how we speak.
If you don't like my views then don't read them. If you do like my views or want to comment on anything I've said then feel free to feedback. I generally respond to people who feedback on my posts. Onto the review.
Impact 15th Nov 07 - Jim Cornett tells West & Tenay they can't mention 2 of the participants from the last PPV. I assumed he meant Booker T & Scott Hall.
Show opens with Kurt Angle coming out to bore us on the mic. Nash interupts him & they fight, Nash getting beaten down by Kurt's cronies. The X-Division make the save.
Tag Match - Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs LAX. This was a pretty decent match. I still want to see Jimmy Rave with a better partner than Hoyt (someone like James Storm, Chris Harris or Petey Williams). Rave gets the win from the roll-up.
More from Team 3d in their heel turn which is getting old.
Mixed Tag Match - Robert Roode & Miss Brooks vs Gail Kim & Chris Harris. Roode took the win from a chair shot & hopefully Miss Brooks is now a solo wrestler.
A bit more b**ls**t storyline with Team 3d & it seems Havok is now no longer part of Seratonin (when was he part of the X-Divsion ever?).
Hall & Nash come out to the ring for a chat to us.
3 way match - Rellik vs Black Reign vs Abyss. This was more of a 2 on 1 with Rellik & Reign working together. Abyss got the win off Rellik with the Black Hole Slam. Unsurprisingly with Rhyno making the save this looked like a set-up for a future PPV tag match.
Womens match - Awesome Kong vs Alexa Jade. Another squash match where another girl jobs to Kong, this gets neither woman over. Kong won off the sit-out powerbomb. Why are they bothering with Kong, not even ODB is big enough to be an even matchup for her. The post match run in from Gail Kim definately put her over big time.
Cornette's 2 new signings are announced as Booker T & Sharmell. Booker looked very happy coming down to the ring.
TNA World Heavyweight Title - Kaz vs Kurt Angle. Kaz was never likely to win this as the odds of Angle dropping the belt at a house show are very low indeed. Kaz worked well as he pretty much always does & Angle put him over very well too. Angle took the predictable win.
Samoa Joe is revealed as Hall & Nash's partner.
Impact 22nd Nov 07 - TNA Turkey Bowl, 3 way Match which is basically a guy from the Heavyweight division, a guy from the Tag division and a guy from the X-Division all competing in a knockout match with the eventual winner getting $25,000 and the loser has to wear a turkey suit (Ala The Gobbledy Gooker, didn't TNA Spanish Announcer Hector Guerrero once wear that suit?).
1st Semi final - Brother Devon vs Abyss vs Chris Sabin. Devon jumped Sabin before Abyss ever made it to the ring Devon got the best of this match at the start but all 3 guys worked well & looked ok. Rellik & Black Reign distracted Abyss who was saved by Rhyno, leaving Sabin & Devon to finish the match. Sabin got a great win after a failed run-in from Brother Ray.
TNA Turkey Bowl 2nd Semi final - Johnny Devine (dropping the "Havok" name after his run with Team 3d last week) vs Kip James vs Samoa Joe. Joe sold well for Kip & Devine at the start & Joe took the win from the Muscle Buster off Devine.
TNA Turkey Bowl 3rd Semi final - AJ Styles vs Jay Lethal (still running TNA's worst gimmick ever) vs Christian Cage. Cage was a no-show by the bell so AJ & Lethal went 1 on 1. Both guys are good workers & made a decent match before Cage decided to join them. During another badly timed commercial break Styles was run out of the ring by Cage. Lethal worked Cage well enough but it was a pretty scrappy match by Cage. AJ Styles got a win that I actually predicted when I saw the previous winners as we already had an X Division guy & a Heavyweight guy so obviously the Tag guy was going to win.
3 way Womens match - Velvet Sky vs Angelina Love vs ODB. It's clear from this bit of booking that TNA management still don't trust the women or take them seriously enough. ODB's main role was to put the other 2 girls over & let them show their talents. Both Love & Sky worked really well & looked stunning too. I did hope this wasn't going to be a squash match but sadly it was with a predictable win for ODB but the other 2 girls gave a great match.
TNA Turkey Bowl final - Chris Sabin vs Samoa Joe vs AJ Styles. On the face of it this sounded like an AWESOME match but with the way their running AJ's character I predicted Sabin to win & AJ to get the Turkey suit. As a 3 way match I did wonder how they were going to decide who "lost" this, My assumption was whoever got pinned was "the loser". All 3 of these guys are excellent workers & made for a very good fast paced match. Samoa Joe got the win from AJ so I at least did pick the correct loser.
Impact 29th Nov 07 - Show opens with new signings Booker T & Sharmell coming down to bore us on the mic.
Mixed Tag Match - Eric Young & Gail Kim vs Christy Hemme & Jimmy Rave. Kim & Hemme did ok to showcase themselves, Young & Rave worked pretty well too. Kim got a good win for her team.
Some storyline c**p involving Young afterwards.
An Anything Goes Big Boy Street Fight Tag Match - Sonjay Dutt & Jay Lethal vs Team 3d. 3d got the eventual win after Johnny Devine interfered.
Rellik vs Rhyno. Sorry, but never did I ever believe for even a femto second this would stay a 1 on 1 match. Rhyno got the win & my prediction came true after the win was called with a run in by Black Reign & a save by Abyss.
Special Challenge Match, Robert Roode vs Booker T - as an Impact debut Booker couldn't really expect a big name to work with but this was always going to be Booker winning before the match even started. Roode had a decent enough match & also put Booker over very well. A predictable win to Booker off the "axe kick" formerly known as the Book-end.
8 Man Tag Match - Christian Cage, Aj Styles, Tomko & Kurt Angle vs Kaz, (have they been recycling Shane Douglas' old TNA wardobe for Kaz?), Scott Steiner, Abyss & Samoa Joe. Just about everyone got to hit their finisher in this match with Joe winning off the muscle buster.
Turning Point PPV 07 - 6 man Tag Team Tables Match. Team 3d & Johnny Devine vs Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley & Black Machismo. On the face of it this seemed to be a foregone conclusion of 3d winning as the heavier team with expertise in tables matches. The X Division guys were the more cohesive unit working better together as a team. After a c**p ref knockout (all referee knockouts are c**p by the way) 3d got the win.
TNA Knockout Womens Tag Match - Roxxi Laveaux & ODB vs Velvet Sky & Angelina Love. A very well worked match with Love & Sky getting the better of it & the eventual win.
James Storm vs Eric Young. This match did NOT belong in a PPV. An overly long dull match with Young getting the win.
Feast Or Fired - Basically a classic Russo inspired "something on a pole" match with 4 cases, 1 contains an X-Division title shot, 1 contains a Heavyweight title shot, 1 contains a Tag title shot & 1 says "Your Fired" so it's also got that "Loser leaves TNA" twist as well. Triple X vs Sonjay Dutt vs Sharkboy vs Petey Williams vs Lance Hoyt & Jimmy Rave vs Chris Harris vs VKM vs LAX vs Scott Steiner. Idle gossip had already told us that Senshi was leaving so we knew who was going to get the "Your Fired" case. West & Tenay told us the contents of these cases weren't going to be announced until the following weeks Impact so WHAT WAS THE F**KING POINT OF THIS MATCH? Petey Williams got case #4 (most likely an X-Division title shot), BG James took case#1 (almost certainly the Tag title shot), Senshi got case #3 (which must have been "Your Fired") and case #2 went to Scott Steiner (almost certainly the Heavyweight title shot).
TNA Knockout Womens Championship Match - Gail Kim vs Awesome Kong. Kong had a new ring outfit & wore something under it having learnt from her previous PPV clothing failure/breast flash. This was never going to be pretty & on the face of it seemed to be yet another in Kong's serious of squash matches. Kim retained the belt after Kong pushed the ref getting herself dq'd.
Tag Match of 10,000 thumbtacks. Black Reign & Rellik vs Abyss & Raven (replacing Rhyno who was out after Rellik injured his neck in a match we obviously never saw on tv). Raven seems to have slimmed down a bit more for this match. This was never going to pretty & we weren't going to see much actual wrestling, mainly brawling harkening back to the classic days of ECW. The annoying & extremely loud woman screaming ABYSS! made this match hard to bear. Raven put Black Reign into a table of thumbtacks from the top turnbuckle (effectively ending his match) & fell through another table very hard himself leaving Rellik & Abyss to duke it out. Abyss got the win for his team after putting Rellik into thumbtacks in the ring with The Black Hole Slam.
Tag Match - Robert Roode & Christian Cage vs Booker T & Kaz. Booker getting his 2nd ppv appearance since coming to TNA. Kaz made the best of this match as well, working well as he usually does. Roode had one of his better matches & even Cage gave a decent account of himself in the ring for a change. Booker got the win for his team after Roode mistakenly hit Cage with the chair.
Samoa Joe shoots on Scott Hall's no-show.
Joe also shoots big time before the match starts, especially against Hall & Nash.
6 Man Tag Team Grudge Match - AJ Styles, Tomko & Kurt Angle vs Kevin Nash, Samoa Joe & Eric Young replacing that unreliable drunken f**k Scott Hall. I think when Joe said "fire me, I don't care" he genuinely meant it!. All the work from Joe was going to be his hardest, likewise all the work from Eric Young. This was a new side to Eric Young with him doing moves I've never seen him attempt before. Joe, Nash & Young made the 2nd half of this match with Joe getting the win with the Muscle Buster off Tomko of all people.
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