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Thursday, July 19, 2007

My TNA Monthly Catch-up, Jul - Aug 07

On time this month ;-) The views expressed in this catch-up are my own. Some stuff I won't discuss because it's utter s**t and offers nothing to further TNA or help wrestling. I call it how I see it, you don't like my views then don't read them Welcome to Smarkdom ;-)

Impact 19th Jul 07 - Impacts opening titles appear to have changed! Show opens with Triple X (Senshi, Chris Daniels & Elix Skipper) vs Seratonin with Raven filing in for Kaz/Kazarian who has now left them. Pretty even match, Senshi took the win for Triple X.

Lance Hoyt (& Christy Hemme who appears to be getting sluttier by the week) vs Kip James (with BG & Roxie), Kip won from The Famouser in a match that wasn't much to talk about.

Revenge match - Christian Cage & James Storm (who needs a new gimmick pretty soon, the whole cowboy thing is so old now) vs Rhyno & Chris Harris. Storm took the win with help from Dustin Rhodes and a chair. Weak match, hopefully this Storm/Harris feud will be over soon

Oh, and a load of storyline b**ls**t occurred. Who cares?

Impact 26th Jul 07 - No DQ match - Robert Roode vs Sting, this match never promised much, It was too long and very dull. Sting took the win.

Tag match - Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley vs LAX. Another overly long match with nothing to offer. Homicide took the win for his team. Suddenly Team 3d have become hated in the Impact Zone? When did that happen then?

Lots of storyline and folks shooting the breeze not worth talking about.

No DQ Match - AJ Styles vs Abyss. A lot of outside interfence and general b**ls**t from what started as a decent enough match. Whoever cut Abyss under the ring really f**ked up the blading as he was pouring blood from his head. Styles took the win in the end.

Impact 2nd Aug 07 - Tag Match - Team 3d vs Chris Harris & Eric Young. Team 3d as heels aren't very good but took the win in this excuse for a match.

Tag Match - Triple X vs Sonjay Dutt ( I hate his Guru gimmick!) & Jay (Needs a better gimmick) Lethal. Daniels took the win in this AWFUL match and TNA gets worse by the match.

Ladder match with stipulations - Christian Cage & AJ Styles vs Abyss & Sting. We finally saw the 1st appearance of Andrew Martin (Test from WWE) helping out Sting & Abyss, fighting with Tomko. Abyss got the contract & win for his team & Martin was kicking ass & looking good!

Impact 9th Aug 07 - Show opens (and we get a look at Matt Morgan with Cornette) and Cornette announces some stuff for the upcoming PPV.

Some b**ls**t about a bloke called Pacman, his opening words were very true. "You don't know me". No, I don't have a f**king clue who you are and don't give a f**k either.

6 Man House of Fun Match - Raven, James Storm & Robert Roode vs Kaz, Chris Harris & Rhyno. These matches are normally PPV only so it promised a lot! A pretty fast paced match, Kaz as usual gave an excellent account of himself (he just gets better every time I watch him, put a belt on him soon?) . Roode took the eventual win off Kaz.

Tag Match - Kip James & Brother Devon (in an unusual 1-off get together) vs Homicide & Rick Steiner (whilst Scott is still recuperating from his surgery no doubt). The Steiners are now filling a face role even though Scott has never been a face in TNA. Rick Steiner looked very out of shape in this match, very ring rusty but still taking some decent bumps. Kip took the win from the famouser off Homicide.

Hard Justice PPV 07 - 3 Way X Division Tag Match - Jay Lethal & Sonjay Dutt vs Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley vs Chris Daniels & Senshi (part of Triple X and Elix Skipper came down with them). As always with the X Division guys this was a fast paced match, lots of good moves throughout. Sonjay Dutt giving a great account of himself (lose the S**T gimmick please?), he makes a real good sell and was getting everyone over. Elix Skippers ropewalk hurricanrana was f**king awesome! Lethal finally took the win off a small package. Awesome for an opening match!

Raven vs Kaz - With the remnants of Seratonin behind him Raven certainly had the edge in numbers here. This pretty much started on the outside but managed to stay in the ring. Kaz took the win, no shock there really. He's getting his gradual push at the moment. I see him teaming with Chris Harris soon, perhaps.

Bar Room Brawl (No DQ, Anything goes rules) - James Storm (with Jackie Moore) vs Rhyno. This went right into the crowd in seconds, Rhyno must have felt like he was back in ECW. I guess drinking the beer during this match might be the start of a heel turn for Rhyno. This match was pretty weak despite the no dq factor, neither man made anything of it. Storm took the win. Very scrappy match indeed for a PPV.

Tag Match - VKM vs LAX. Kip had been going through his old ring clothes by the looks of it, he was wearing an old Mr Ass outfit. Kip took the win. Hector Guererro helped get the match restarted and LAX won. Konnan has been replaced, it seems.

Ultimate Humiliation Tar & Feather Match - Robert Roode vs Eric Young. Despite Roode being the bigger and heavier guy and the better wrestler it was obvious Young was going to win this after the storyline his character has been going through. In a total turn-around Roode took the win! With an assist from Gail Kim, Miss Brooks got tarred and feathered. Can her breasts GET any bigger?

Chris Harris vs Black Reign (aka Dustin Rhodes) - They've taken the Goldust gimmick and turned it to the dark side, using a black & white outfit instead of Gold. Rhodes was pretty much unrecognisable in the Black Reign outfit and facepaint. Harris won by dq after Rhodes hit 2 referee's. Personally I think Rhodes f**ked something up during the match and they had to take this one home earlier than expected.

Tag Team Grudge Match - The Steiners vs Team 3d. With 3d as the heels, the Steiners looked like pre-match favourites. Scott looked pretty good for a man who's had some pretty hard surgery and hasn't been in the ring for a while. Rick was looking a lot better in the ring than the last match I saw him in, the rust is coming off quickly and he's finding his old school self. Loved seeing Scott do the Frankensteiner on Devon (not easy on such a big guy!). The Steiners got the obvious (and easily predicted) win.

A bit of b**ls**t where Ron Killings did a sell job to get some nobody I've ever heard of (Pacman WHO?) over.

Doomsday Chamber Of Blood Match - Christian Cage, AJ Styles & Tomko vs Sting, Abyss & Andrew Martin going under his new name - The Punisher. Rules are you can only pin a man if he's bleeding. Tomko was cut 1st, Abyss was cut open by Cage with "glass". AJ Styles took a good blackhole slam onto the glass and Abyss got the fall and the #1 contender spot for next months PPV.

Main Event, Winner Takes All Match - On the line, the X Division Belt, Tag Championship Belts, TNA World Heavyweight Belt & Kurts IWGP (Japan) belt all on the line. With a b**ls**t side story about Kurts ex-wife (is that his real wife? doubtful) I had Angle pegged to win this as the pre-match favourite. Whoever described Joe as "an indy nobody" in one of these groups hasn't got a f**king clue about wrestling outside of the WWE. He almost certainly doesn't know Joe worked for WWE once as well. The fact that Joe had Angle tapping out but the ref was "knocked out" (that c**p is so old it's unreal), Angle got the win and ALL the titles off a b**ls**t chair shot with his wifes help.

Best match of the night, pretty much like last month. The X Division guys stole the show, Kaz is coming along well. Dutt did injure himself (that f**kwit Daniels moved during his moonsault out of the ring and caught Dutt in the lower ribs, totally Daniels' fault) and was holding his ribs for the remainder of that match.