Reviews of Wrestling, Movies, TV and much more! Strong language has been censored by me for blog content

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

WWE Extreme Rules 18th Apr 10 reviewed

Caveat:- I do NOT watch WWE programming, I am unaware of any current storyline or who are faces or heels. This review does contain swearing, if that might offend you then stop reading now or you've no-one to blame except yourself.
Street Fight (No Count outs or DQ, win by pin or submission only), HHH vs Sheamus - Trips had his intro then failed to show & we cut to him & Sheamus already going at it backstage, Trips took a couple of steel pipe shots before Teddy Long finally got him away. No finish as the match never started so no result either.
Miz & The Big Show come out & shoot their mouths until Teddy Long cuts them off by booking them against a team of his choosing for a future shot at the Unified Tag titles. For continuing to run his (The Miz) mouth Long books them against 3 teams there and then.
Miz & The Big Show vs R-Truth & John Morrison - Big Show & The Miz are calling themselves ShowMiz, P**s poor bout with an even worse call, Morrison had Big Show in a Headscissors & Show was waving like he was tapping out yet for some bulls**t kayfabe reason the ref awarded the match to ShowMiz on a DQ for no reason that was explained.
Miz & The Big Show vs MVP & Mark Henry - Another piss poor match, MVP had it won off the Playmaker when Big Show hit him allowing The Miz to take the pin for an easy win.
Miz & The Big Show vs The Hart Dynasty (with Natalya & Brett Hart) - Over in seconds after Smith got a pin following the Hart Attack (better known as The Doomsday Device) meaning The Hart Dynasty earn themselves a shot at the Unified Tag Titles.
CM Punk (with Serena & Luke Gallows) vs Rey Mysterio - If Punk loses he gets his head shaved. Another p**s poor match that was mostly Mysterio, Serena & Gallows were sent back to the locker room after interfering but someone under the ring distracted the ref by throwing a chair into the ring long enough to hit a Reverse Powerbomb on Mysterio allowing Punk to take the easy win off the Go To Sleep.
Strap Match (actually a 4 Corners match), Shad Gaspard vs JTG - Won by JTG, completely shit.
World Heavyweight Championship Match, Jack Swagger vs Randy Orton - No Count outs or DQ, win by pin or submission only. Frankly its f**king hysterical how much of a big deal WWE make about holding this title considering it was once the most reviled belt in WWF history as the former WCW world heavyweight title. The only nods to extreme in the match were the use of a garbage can, Swagger taking a bump on the ring steps & Orton taking a bump onto a chair which bent it. Swagger took the win off a Gut Wrench Power Bomb to retain his title.
Street Fight (No Count outs or DQ, win by pin or submission only), HHH vs Sheamus - This time Sheamus came out 1st insisting the ref raise his hand if Trips was unable to show but obviously he came out anyway. Trips took this to the floor early hoping to beat Sheamus down, this was pretty s*t to be honest even though Trips worked "injured" and sold that pretty well, I'm not sure if him fucking up the DDT was kayfabe or deliberate it was hard to tell. Sheamus wasn't fully willing to sell the Drop Toe Hold into the ring steps (blame the badly positioned cameraman for that s**tty no-sell there) but he did sell the Kendo Stick shot, Sheamus took the eventual win.
Extreme Makeover Match for the Womens Championship, Michelle McCool (with Vicky Guererro & Layla) vs Beth Phoenix - McCool used hairspray & an ironing board, I assume the flub with the Iron was on purpose & I'd love the thank the replay team for totally no-selling the colour desk telling us McCools head hit the table when it clearly doesnt in the replay. Phoenix took a nice top rope bump onto 2 ironing boards & took the win off the Glam Slam to win the title.
Steel Cage Match, Edge vs Chris Jericho - Note the stipulations "Victory can be achieved by pinfall, submission or escaping the cage". Jericho clearly WINS the match by escaping the cage @9.26 & to the colour guy stating "he's gotta get down to the floor" I'm afraid thats sheer kayfabe bulls**t on your part mate, no such rule was stated at the start. Edge is declared the winner off The Spear 11 minutes later. F**K OFF.
Last Man Standing Match for the WWE Championship, Batista vs John Cena - Stipulations were announced as follows but after the last match its not like anyone is going to believe them for a f**king second:- No Countout, No DQ, No pinfalls or submissions, your opponant MUST stay down for a full 10 count for you to win. Erm, did one of the colour guys use Batistas real name? No Kayfabe? "Not only does it injure Dave" WHOOPS! You meant Batista you f**king rookie retard. Seems the ref didnt know how to do his job either by leaving the ring to count Batista, dont the rules say you have a 10 count to make it back INTO the ring or did this c**t get his refs shirt as a prize in a box of f**king cereal? Cena gets a truly awful win after taping Batistas feet together around a ring post with Duct Tape to retain his title.
If this excuse of a PPV is what passes for Extreme these days then WWE are not long for this world. Quite frankly I've had more extreme s**ts than this. Way to s**t on all your loyal fans WWE.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

The State Of TNA Address

As I've stopped writing catch-ups I wanted to do something which would allow me to talk about TNA so I've decided to do this, my State Of TNA Address. I've been a fan of TNA since 2004 and watched enough of the product to know
its workers, announcers, writers and owner.

Where is TNA right now? Thats a good question, today is Tuesday 20th April 2010.

Yesterday was a fairly good live Impact where RVD was crowned the new Heavyweight Champion after a decent match with AJ Styles & a very good match with Jeff Hardy. Samoa Joe has returned seemingly as a face allied to Team Hogan. Madison Rayne is the new Knockouts Champion, The Beautiful People are Knockout Tag Champions, Kazarian is the new X Division Champion and Matt Morgan & Hernandez (currently working in Mexico) are Tag Champions.

Hogan & Bischoff are still most definately running the show but gradually Hogans Cronies are being trimmed. The Nasty Boys are out of favour if not officially gone & Sean "Val Venis" Morley is very gone, he may have seemed like a good idea at the time but he wasn't. Chris Daniels, Awesome Kong & Consequences Creed are also definately gone too with little to no explanation at all.

So where next for TNA?

Putting a title on RVD was an eventual idea which has happened sooner than later. RVD was the obvious choice over Jeff Hardy who still has legal issues looming in his immediate future and nothing will be worked around Hardy until those issues are fully resolved.

With Sean "Syxx Pac" Waltman no-showing for Lockdown his immediate future must be called into question & dealt with as quickly as possible. My personal choice there would be a definate clean & non-kayfabe on air firing by Dixie Carter who should precede her announcement with "This is NOT a work". TNA must also address their recent losses and give the fans hard information during an Impact, announcements about Creed, Kong & Daniels should be made ideally by someone like JB.

Now is also a good time to take a very hard look at the whole TNA roster to cut some deadweight, certain people are still gainfully employed who should be "future endeavoured" & at the very top of that list would have to be Sharkboy. I am very sorry you burnt your trailer to the ground & lost everything you owned but its time to either work for TNA or seek employment elsewhere. Despite being a current title holder I think its also time for Matt Morgan to find a new job & Tomko also needs to be released.

News of a possible return by Scott Steiner is not something I am happy to hear along with the continued employment of Bubba The Love Sponge. TNA are upping their game by giving RVD a title but its time the mens Tag Belts went to someone who can actually put on a show. The Knockouts roster needs at least 2 or 3 more women to replace Kong, Traci Brooks & the retired Christie Hemme. It would be nice to bring in some more hardcore style workers to replace Mickie Knuckles & Roxxi who I was sad to see leave again.

There is plenty of talent available globally, all TNA have to do is get it and use it wisely. We cant watch Beer Money, Team 3D & the Motor City Machineguns going at it forever. We need at least 3 more new tag teams with World Elite & The British Invasion both having recently disbanded. Teams like Triple X (Chris Daniels & Elix Skipper) were exactly what TNA thrived on before, skill & high flying fast paced action. There is no reason TNA can't regain that style again and finally REALLY stand for Total Non-stop Action.

Here endeth the address ;-)

Ghost Hunters S06E07 - Inn of the Dead reviewed

I note they were STILL sticking with the flashlights thing after we openly debunked it last week and said here it wouldnt be accepted as proof of paranormal (its merely the plain old boring normal) and we also said it'd be unacceptable to present it as even vaguely paranormal. You think Pilgrim would read this forum then do a bit of creative editing on the fly to no longer include this in any further shows no its been officially and very scientifically debunked as plain old ARCING.

I do agree the Ghost Hunters must have super hearing, Jason & Grant hearing a scream which wasn't audible on the show, also Britts shushing noise in the bar. What was VERY annoying was how they cut away from Joe Chinns camera JUST as he was pointing it at the "bang" in room 5 also Jay & Grants "looked like something walked towards the door" convieniently behind the cameraman filming them and NOT what they were looking at. Another thing we constantly berate them for yet they never try to address or fix.

During the reveal yet again they presented a personal experience with no physical proof that Jason, Grant & the cameraman heard but they had nothing on tape. Yet again Jay & Grant showing themselves to be worse than rookie investigators. 1st rule of evidence presentation is to have ACTUAL evidence to present, NOT a personal experience which can be discounted as hearsay.

They even then have the cheek to present the tape of Jay & Grant being filmed seeing that "something" that walked towards the door BEHIND a cameraman. This has to be the worst example of presenting something you do NOT have physical proof of, way to make yourselves look like rank amateurs guys. Grant claims he was filming it and "the IR was too strong to pick up the subtle differences". In other words Grant you captured nothing and presented hearsay yet again.

They also present the "womans scream" where all you can hear is one of the 3 people in the room breathing slightly loudly, no scream so yet again another case of presenting a personal experience as evidence. They also present the lights as evidence of paranormal which we know its not.

The only real piece of evidence was an EVP either saying get me down or let me out.

Guys you do realise by now ANY shred of respect we may have had for you in the past has been completely destroyed by pulling stuff like this. You CAN NOT present personally experiences as evidence. Unless its on camera or audio tape it is NOT evidence and can NOT be presented to the client at all. 3 people having the same experience is NOT proof. Stick to the rules you yourselves created, go back and review them in older seasons if you must. At this juncture in time both Jason & Grant are even making Brian Harnois look positively professional compared to them now.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Name Deleted (a sci fi short script)

NAME DELETED.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Set in a future world of political correctness gone mad.
This short 10 minute script was written for a competition run by the Sci-Fi channel run in 2000. It finished in the top 50 winning me a T-shirt and glow in the dark mini alien.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FADE IN

INT. PRISON CELL

PRISONER is sitting on a bunk in a cell; the cell is an 8-foot cube. The walls are a light grey, there's a strip light recessed into the centre of the ceiling. It lights the whole room, it's quite bright so there isn't much shadow in the room. The door is in the foreground, on the left-hand side.

The bunk is in the background, set into the right wall, so PRISONER'S head is touching the right corner wall. Unless written as otherwise, all PRISONER'S lines are spoken as narrative. When the CENSOR speaks, it is as a voice off-camera, to drown out what PRISONER is saying. PRISONER is wearing a grey one-piece tunic.

PRISONER (SPOKEN AS NARRATIVE)
I've been sitting in this cell
for nine days now. What did I
do? They must have detected
some violation against the codes.
I couldn't even begin to guess what
I might have done.

PRISONER has been sitting on the bunk while saying this.

PRISONER
They took me on Zone day and
today is Zenith day because I
heard the Zenith bell ringing
from Latin Square, so I think it
must be at least about nine days
by now. It's hard to be sure.

PRISONER moves his head and now looks toward the cell door, then slowly around the cell.

PRISONER
I must be in the Judgement
Building. When I heard the
Zenith bell it was very close
by. Latin Square is only two
blocks from the Judgement
Building and the bell sounded
very loud.

PRISONER gets up from the bunk in the corner, which he is sitting on. It's a cross between a bunk bed and a bench; there are no visible blankets or pillows. He walks toward the cell door, and his narrative continues as he paces between the door and the bunk.

PRISONER
When the officers spoke to me they
asked me about a man called


CENSOR (AS A DISEMBODIED VOICE)
NAME DELETED!

PRISONER
And where I had first heard him
mentioned. The big one with the
ugly face had asked me that.

PRISONER walks back to the bunk and sits facing the door, with his back against the wall. His feet are in the air and he's looking down at his shoes. They're shiny and he's miserable.

PRISONER
I told him that I knew no one of
that name. I don't think he really
cared if I was telling the truth.
The skinny one asked when I had
first met

CENSOR
NAME DELETED!

PRISONER
And had I met him directly or did
I have another contact, A

CENSOR
NAME DELETED!

PRISONER
I told SKINNY that I had not heard
of this man either. This was the
first time I had heard those
names. SKINNY just sneered at me
and I was taken back to the cell.

PRISONER is nodding to himself as he says the next lines.

PRISONER
That was my first interview, but I
knew they'd want to speak to me
again. And real soon.

PRISONER lies on the bed and sleeps facing the wall, He is dreaming. We enter his dream. This is a flashback.

FADE OUT.

EXT. A STREET WITH TERRACED HOUSES, DAYTIME.

FADE IN

The houses are beautiful, it looks like small-town America. A lot like the street used in Edward Scissorhands, but only one of the gardens has grass. There are no cars to be seen.

As the steadi-cam camera pans down the street, we pass a big blue van with the words FedPol Patrol Stencilled in white on the side. We stop in front of two houses; the house with the grass is on our left. There is a man mowing the grass. PRISONER is watching through the front window of the house on the right.

PRISONER
As I slept in the cell I
Remembered about the day they had
taken my neighbour away, It was
the day before they took me.

INT. INSIDE PRISONERS HOUSE, LOOKING THROUGH THE WINDOW TO THE GARDENS

We are behind PRISONER, looking over his shoulder at his POV. He is watching the mowing man, and shaking his head in a negative way. The window is slightly ajar; the mower engine can be heard.

PRISONER
I was thinking to myself how
ridiculous the FedPols had got,
that they were changing the codes
every other day.

PRISONER sees the FedPol van stop in front of mowing mans garden. 2 men in grey uniforms get out. They are wearing full body armour; their helmet visors are smoked glass so you don't see their faces.

PRISONER
So many trivial things had now
become punishable by adjustment.
He was out there, mowing his lawn.
He'd paid more than fifty thou'
for that two square metres of
turf.

As PRISONER looks through the window at the mowing man, you can also see the reflection of his own face on the glass.

PRISONER
I'd always said it'd never grow,
but he proved me wrong. But
still, all that time he'd put in
suddenly didn't matter to the
FedPols.

The two officers approach the mowing man; He turns off the mower and looks at both of the Officers.

FEDPOL OFFICERS (SPEAKING TO
MOWING MAN)
Sorry, but that's against the code
Citizen! You'll have to come with
us I'm afraid.

The FedPol Officers take Mowing Man and his mower to their van, he goes with them peacefully. PRISONER watches them take him and put both him and the mower inside the van and close the van doors.

PRISONER
That's what they said to him, as
he was put into the Peace Wagon.

PRISONER pauses for a moment, a few seconds pass. He is watching the van front doors closing as the officers get back in.

PRISONER
He went quietly. Everyone does.
Is there any other way?

FADE OUT.

INT. PRISON CELL

FADE IN

PRISONER awakes. Time has passed. He sits up on the bed facing the door, recalling another memory.

PRISONER
I was taken to be questioned again
earlier today.

CROSS FADE TO

INT. INTERVIEW ROOM

CROSS FADE IN

We are in a darkened room with a small rectangular table large enough to seat PRISONER on one side and two guards opposite him.

We are shooting from behind the guards with occasionally glances from PRISONERS POV, looking briefly at the guards who are interviewing him. There is a wall visible behind PRISONER; it's the same grey colour as the cell. When we see from PRISONER'S POV, the wall behind the guards looks almost identical.

The room is dark enough to use parts of the cell set. There is never a time when the whole room is seen, so this can be a partial set. This initial shot is over the shoulders of the guards, looking at PRISONER. When the guards speak, it is aloud.

PRISONER (STILL AS A NARRATIVE)
The two guards continued to
question me relentlessly. They
asked me who had told me about

CENSOR
NAME DELETED!

PRISONER
And where had I heard of him, they
wanted to know everything. I just
couldn't remember, but I was
desperately trying to help like a
good Citizen should do.

The guards are now viewed from PRISONERS POV. The guard sitting on the left (UGLY) is balding and obese; he has a scar on his right cheek. The guard sitting on the right (SKINNY) is skinny and wiry looking. He is wearing steel rimmed glasses. They don't fit very well, so he keeps pushing them back up on his nose. They are both wearing similar grey uniforms.

PRISONER
UGLY had asked me

UGLY
Where were you on Xavier's day?

PRISONER
I told him that I always spent
that holiday having a meal in the
same cafe.

SKINNY
Yeah, Zelo's Cafe. WE know!

PRISONER
This really surprised me. UGLY
then played a tape of my
conversation with the waiter.

Running in the background is a recording being played from somewhere, UGLY will gesture with his right hand and the recording starts. We hear the recording, playing in the background as a muffled conversation running parallel to PRISONER'S narrative about it.

WAITER (MUFFLED LIKE A RECORDING)
Happy Xavier's day sir, may I take
your order?

PRISONER
I heard my order

PRISONER (ALSO MUFFLED LIKE A
RECORDING)
I'll have a salad and a cold beer
please.

PRISONER
And the waiter's response.

WAITER (RECORDING)
Certainly sir, I'll bring your
drink directly and the food will
take a short while. Enjoy your
meal, and thank you for eating at
Zelo's on Xavier's day!

PRISONER
I then heard myself start to speak
and then I heard my own voice say

CENSOR
NAME DELETED!

UGLY
Was that your voice on the tape?

As PRISONER nods his head in affirmation, he speaks this line as narrative.

PRISONER
I could only nod in the
affirmative, the detectors in the
room would have known if I were
lying anyway. SKINNY was enjoying
the moment of glory and made sure
the detectors knew as well.

SKINNY
Let the record show that the
prisoner has nodded his head in
the affirmative. This has been
visually observed by both myself
and my partner.


SKINNY turns to UGLY and grins, gleefully.

SKINNY
Yeah, He's telling the truth

UGLY sneers at PRISONER, he is gloating.

UGLY
There you are, little man.
Condemned by your own words.

UGLY draws the thumb of his right hand across his throat in the familiar throat slitting gesture. The two guards stand and escort PRISONER into the darkness.

CROSS FADE TO

INT. PRISON CELL

The door opens and PRISONER is propelled into the room and onto the floor by UGLY and SKINNY. PRISONER is in the middle of the room, kneeling on the floor. He turns and SKINNY is closing the cell door. SKINNY smiles like a shark and flips a fake salute at PRISONER as he closes the cell door.

SKINNY
Now don't you go nowhere, we'll
be back real soon. So play nice!

PRISONER clambers to his feet and walks over to the bunk. He stands at the foot of the bunk with his back to the door, he's clenching his fists.

PRISONER
I went through the conversation
I'd had with the waiter at Zelo's,
and suddenly, I remembered.

PRISONER sits on the bunk and puts his hands to his temple in a moment of realisation. He holds his head in his hands and shakes his head.

PRISONER
I HAD said that name! I called out
to the ever present, but invisible
detectors.

PRISONER removes his hands from his head and looks up to the ceiling. He places his hands together in front, as if praying.

PRISONER (SPEAKING ALOUD)
Wait! Now I remember! I DID say
it. I did say

CENSOR
NAME DELETED!

PRISONER raises his hands to the ceiling, in expectation.

PRISONER (SPEAKING ALOUD)
I'm guilty! Adjust me!

The room fills with a thick cloud of gas, eventually obscuring PRISONER from sight

FADE OUT.

EXT. PRISONERS HOUSE

PRISONER is standing outside his front door, there is no longer any grass next door as the house is boarded up; we are seeing him from the POV behind a FedPol van. We also see two FedPol Officers, one is dictating into a handheld device.

FEDPOL OFFICER 1
Federal log record 5327-Alpha. The
Prisoner has woken after his
adjustment, returned to his
domicile. Any other incidents in
the vicinity, control?

CONTROLLERS VOICE (OVER THE RADIO)
That's an affirm Peace Wagon Lambda
20. Report to Sector 26, Block 12.
Code Violation Three twenty seven,
Ten offenders. Seize all offenders
and bring them in. Use all
necessary force as you see fit.
The use of lethal force has been
approved by the FedPolMarshal.

The officer punches in something on a console in the van.

FEDPOL OFFICER 1
Offenders, they never learn!

He and his partner shake their heads in disbelief.

FEDPOL OFFICER 2
Guess not. At least we're on overtime
again though.

FEDPOL OFFICER 1
Roger control, on our way. Lambda
20 out.

The van drives away, we see PRISONER enter his house and the front door closes behind him.

FADE TO BLACK.

NARRATIVE OVER VDU SCREEN

As these lines are spoken, they appear as if typed onto the screen. They are a large font and easily visible. They are spoken by a female voice.

OPERATOR 97643B
This concludes the statement of
Prisoner Kappa 271398. Prisoner
Kappa 271398 pleaded guilty to
code violation twelve sixty three,
formally speaking his own given
birth name. He has been adjusted
to level four in accordance with
regulation nine of the official
code. This record is to be erased
under statute twelve of the
official code, constituting a
danger to FedPol security.
Termination of entry by Operator
97643B.

The screen blinks for a few seconds as a cursor blinks on and off. The following entry then appears.

OPERATOR 97643B
After deletion of these entries
Operator 97643B will be adjusted
to level two in accordance with
FedPol statutes governing security
policies. Termination of entry by
Operator 97643B.

Another pause as the cursor flashes.

OPERATOR 97643B
Addendum. Prisoner Kappa 271398 was
later charged with code violation
eighty nine twenty four, using
descriptive names which are not
politically correct, to whit names
used to describe FedPol Officer
Quebec 73 and FedPol Officer Delta
15. Prisoner Kappa 271398 will
require further adjustment,
possibly up to level ninety-four.

OPERATOR 97643B
A hearing has been set to decide
if Prisoner Kappa 271398 is a
persistent offender. Permanent
adjustment may be required.
Termination of entry by Operator
97643B.

The cursor flashes several more times.

VOICE
ENTRIES DELETED, ADJUSTMENT TO
OPERATOR PERFORMED. SECURITY
STATUS NORMAL. TERMINATION OF
ENTRY.

The screen flashes the words ENTRIES DELETED, five times. The screen then flashes the words STATUS NORMAL five times. The screen flashes the words TERMINATION OF ENTRY five times. The screen changes to show the FedPol Logo.

FADE TO BLACK.

Microsoft virus phone scam

This morning I had a phone call from a guy with a strong Indian accent claiming to be calling from Microsoft in London saying my computer was sending out viruses.

As an ex Call Centre employee I'm instantly suspicious. Its pretty obvious from the jumps on the line he's not in England so I challenge that fact and he lies to me saying he's in London. I tell him he's an unsolicited and unwanted cold call and hang up on him.

No surprise it takes 3 or 4 attempts to break the connection and get a dial tone. A few seconds later the cheeky twat calls back asking me why I hung up on him, he asks if I use Internet Explorer. I tell him I haven't used IE in 5 years and that I use Firefox, he continues to persist that my computer is sending out viruses and that if I go to Google he can show me.

I inform him I am behind a firewall, have plenty of anti virus software but the guy stubbornly persists. I say if you can prove my pc is sending viruses then send me an email to prove it. He says we dont have your email address. I say but your Microsoft, you should have it.

By this time I'm just too annoyed to talk to him any more so I tell him hes a cold call, unsolicited which is illegal and I'm hanging up on him and if he calls back again I'll take legal action. Again it takes several attempts to break the connection (which is always a sure sign of an illegal scam call) but finally I get a dial tone and try 1471 only to get exactly what I expected "The number was withheld", they didnt call back again.

Afterwards I Googled and it turns out these people get you to connect to some program to hijack your machine and steal your bank details or charge you to run anti virus programs for crap they install on it. I guess a less technically educated person might have fallen for it. All I can say is BE CAREFUL!

Saturday 2nd Oct 2010 12:20pm
And guess who called me again? Another thick Indian accent claiming his name was Paul claiming to be from the "Microsoft Technical Department" telling me my computer needed and update.
I said "Did you know its illegal to make cold calls?", his voice wavered as he insisted he was from Microsoft.
So I said "Did you know its illegal to impersonate Microsoft", his voice wavered even more as he insisted he was from Microsoft again.
So I reply "I bet your not" and then HE hung up on me, obviously it was a caller withheld their number after a 1471 so the scam is still being done this maney moneys later.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Lenova Think Centre DVD replacements & upgrades

If this is something your planning to do in your own machine then be aware of one VERY important fact. Despite the fact the front folds upwards that feature is merely to allow easy removal of the leads from the back, to remove the actual drive itself fold the carriage flat and lightly pull the dvd eject cover down then push the dvd from the back out the front of the case.

Dont try what I did and try to remove it from the back by pushing the front, its physically impossible.

Anyway the new dvd-rw is now fitted, a Samsung SH-S222A. The master/slave dipswitch was already in the correct position thankfully so all it needed was to be cabled up. Its currently doing its 1st burn as a test. Which seems to play ok in the computer so thats a good start.