OK, I found Mondays RAW and decided to review it. This a non-WWE fan watching the product so I won't make any apologies for not knowing who people are or anything about current storylines, this is my 1st time watching RAW since 3rd Nov 08 so I'm hardly current. This a real review written by someone who watched the show and these are my own thoughts, views & opinions - if you don't like them then feel free to killfile me. You'll be able to tell this is the real Ray Daley (nobody calls me Raymond ever) as I'm not one of Vince's sheep and I'll call it how I see it. If its s**t I won't even mention it.
Coming from Cleveland, Ohio - Show starts with an overly long video package about Randy Orton who is then introduced as the winner of this years Royal Rumble like we care. Randy reminds us of who he is (so we don't confuse him with the other 5 guys in the ring then?) & introduces Cody Rhodes (who I thought was Evan Bourne) and Ted DiBiase (who is looking great for his f**king age, thats JUNIOR Orton! At least get the f**kers name right?). After wasting 10 minutes of TV time we get the 1st match of the night.
Tag Championship Match - Cryme Tyme vs The Miz & John Morrison (shilling the Owen Hart "carrying my Slammy Award" gimmick so it seems there are no graves WWE wont rob? It'll be Benoit's next then seeing as they already robbed Eddies). Not a great match, Morrison took the win to retain the titles in a match that lasted just less than 3 minutes.
Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match - Kofi Kingston vs Kane. Well this was pretty much a squash match where I expected Kingston to job. Kingston got the shock win off a roll-up in a match that was barely over 2 minutes long.
Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match - Shawn Michaels vs John Cena. Well I see Cena is still running the rapper gimmick that was hammy when he made his 1st WWE appearance using it. The WWE marks were behind Cena in a fairly average match where neither guy gave much of a show, Cena took the win in a match that was just shy of 10 minutes long.
Diva Tag Match - Melina & Kelly Kelly vs Beth Phoenix & Jillian Hall. An interesting start where Melina tried to do a Thesz Press but didn't seem to know how, Kelly has some great moves (which probably explains why she's not Champ and is jobbing in a match like this) but Phoenix took the win in this 2 minute 35 long match.
Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match - Rey Mysterio vs William Regal. Mysterio had the better match but Regal worked pretty well with Mysterio taking the win in just under 4 minutes.
Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match - CM Punk vs Chris Jericho. Jericho is starting to look fat in his old age, he kinda looks like Eddie Izzards fatter & slightly less camp brother. Another average match with neither guy giving his best, its sad that although this was probably the best match of the night neither guy gave his A game. Jericho circa original ECW vs Punk circa early ROH days would have c***ped on this match from a great height, equally sad to see Punk (probably the better worker of the 2 here) having to job with Jericho taking the win in just under 3 and a half minutes.
Orton and Stephanie waste the last 10 minutes of the show, Ortons threats of a law suit so there won't be a Wrestlemania this year are pointless (you don't spend 24 years building up a company just to run a storyline to stop its biggest PPV) but maybe after the farce that was last years Wrestlemania it isn't such a bad idea. It was hysterical (I do hope they intended it to be funny, I was laughing my ass off!) with Shane coming down and rolling up his sleeves because he's about as talented a wrestler as David Arquette was. Considering the large amount of trainers WWE has to call on Shane still didn't know how to sell a punch and they looked as soft as shit.
Most of this show was spent shilling adverts for some show/movie with Cena in it that looked like a cheap rip-off of 24, they showed Orton kicking Vince in the head 4 times. We got 6 matches all with actual finishes but the in-ring action only totalled just over 25 minutes so there was more time spent in commercial breaks than there was in the ring working matches.
If this is the best WWE has to offer then HDNet should be eagerly rubbing its hands for the weekly TV debut of ROH.
No comments:
Post a Comment