Movie Review - Meet the Spartans

This was always going to be bad, it was just a matter of how bad. The movie jumps the shark pretty early on (actually in less than 3 minutes) by showing adult Leonidas going out to fight the wolf when in the real movie it was a very young man who did that. The awful Shrek & Exorcist parodies were dire and the film had barely started too! I assume the dancing penguin was a "Happy Feet" parody? (Having never seen it). There's also the HUGE goof where the penguin shits in Leonidas' face and in the next scene he's totally clean.

Now, what was the point of the Britney Spears scene? It didn't fit into the movie at all, they totally had to shoehorn that scene in. And who was that idiot with the hair saying "I'm not gay?", come to that who is Ryan Seacrest? If your going to sell a movie all over the world don't use Americans who aren't known outside the US? We get that the original movie seemed very homo-erotic in places but this thing just kept shoving the gay references at us over and over. I got the "Ugly Betty" reference but the girl playing her didn't sound very Latino and all the awful Mike Myers jokes that weren't funny when he was doing them in "Wayne's World"? Now the Gatorade ad spoof is pretty pointless as that stuff only retails in the US and the "I will survive" skit, even 300 wasn't THAT gay!. The "Sparta's next Top Model" skit was pretty pointless as well as half the planet aren't going to get that.

Likewise the "Stomp The Yard" skit, only going to be funny if you've actually seen the movie which a LOT of people haven't. Now the Spiderman vs Sandman scene totally didn't work (made even worse by having a woman play Spidey too!). Giving Kevin Sorbo (who must either really need money badly or was doing this as a favour to someone) the line "I'm gonna go Hercules on your ass" is about the funniest joke in the whole movie which speaks volumes about the rest of the film really.

The Ghostrider & Rocky spoofs are pretty awful and Kevin Sorbo gets a half decent death. Again referencing something like "Grand Theft Auto" isn't going to work as not everyone has played it.
I must say Xerxes' "Transformer Cube" looked more like the box out of Hellraiser. The film has an awful ending (you don't even get to see the Spartans die!) and is best avoided. The more than 10 minutes worth of out-takes and the stupid dance number were also a very bad idea.